Blood In The Water (ABANDONED AND REWRITTEN!)
by Urethane
Summary: Young Naruto is left for dead in the forest by the civilians, what happens when a land-shark finds the boy and raises him as his student? A lot of Konoha Bashing, Dark Themes. !SamehadaNaruto !strongNaruto/!femHaku (REWRITTEN: CHECK PROFILE)
1. The Great White Finds a Pup

_Tags: Dark Fic, Character Death, OOC Naruto, Samehada Naruto, A lot of Konoha bashing, Main affinity Suiton Naruto. Kenjutsu Naruto. Kisame as Naruto's sensei. Pairing Naruto/?_

_Note: 15 years old is when they graduate from the Academy. This fic is also kinda casual so don't expect any finesse in the writing._

* * *

_**Blood In The Water**_

Fireworks blew up in the dark sky, lighting up the whole village and blocking out the sight of a myriad of stars. That day marked the day when the Kyuubi no Kitsune was '_slain'_ by the Yondaime Hokage, who died in the process of taking down the beast.

* * *

_"Please Hiruzen… take care of Naruto… don't let the village know that he holds the Kyuubi…" And with that, the Yondaime fell to the grass face first. His face peaceful and happy, knowing that at least his baby boy was safe from the clutches of the vengeful villagers._

_Sarutobi nodded… that was until Minato died, and then his sad face turned into a sneer, one he directed at the sleeping blonde baby._

_This… Demon! He was the cause of all this happening. The village was partially in ruins while the rest suffered minor structural damages, lives were lost, including his wife's, and most importantly, Uzumaki Kushina had died while giving birth to the demon child._

_Hiruzen gritted his teeth, he could not kill the boy, for if he did, there would be no other Uzumaki's left to contain the Kyuubi when it returned and would most likely destroy the village for revenge._

_Kushina was not supposed to have married Minato. She had unfortunately caught his eye and eventually married the blonde man, much to most of the men in the village's chagrin. Why? They had intended to kidnap her once she was old enough when she was out on a fake mission, telling the rest of the village that she had perished in the process. Once they had her, Hiruzen would place her in the secret underground facility, raping and impregnating her for the good of the village._

_Not to mention the pleasure._

_Jiraiya and Hiruzen had lusted for the woman's flesh for at least a decade, and so had the other disgusting males of the village who kept their filthy eyes on her. Dreaming of pulling on her crimson tresses while she took their full lengths, ignoring her cries of protest as they did this to her day in and day out until the day she would be barren and would no longer produce anymore Uzumaki's, not that it would stop there of course, seeing as how Uzumaki's had quite the longevity, retaining their youthfulness even at the age of 50._

_The village would also earn a decent amount of money from people paying to have a go at the once-feisty red head. Heck, even Jiraiya himself had spied on Kushina bathing with the help of his 'Meisaigakure no Jutsu (Hiding with Camouflage Technique)' and had spread word about how well she kept her body from physical training as a Kunoichi. Jiraiya had thanked Kami when he learnt that Kushina never shut the bathroom stall door when she showered, entering through the main door when the loud water started as a cover to hide the squeaking noise it made whenever it opened._

_Luckily, she was spared all of those horrible acts when she had married Minato and died giving birth to Naruto._

_Minato would have been rolling in his grave if this had happened and had thanked the gods when he learned that she had died with him. In death, they would not be able to get his beloved wife… however, in death; they were not able to stop the years of abuse to their baby boy. Rain dripped from the sky, a physical representation of their tears as they saw the village beat and harm the blonde Jinchuuriki._

_Bah! He would ignore the Yondaime in favour of using the hatred the boy gained for the villagers, turning it into a goal to earn their respect by becoming Hokage. Hokage! Hah! The old man laughed behind the cheerful boy's back, smiling kindly like a grandfather only when he needed him. If and when the boy ever became too strong, Danzo's Root forces were instructed to eliminate the Jinchuuriki… after he had been forcefully used to impregnate willing kunoichi's and having his children harvested like crop, to be used forever as Jinchuuriki containers._

_The plan was completely flawless…_

_That was until the stupid fools in the council actually got rid of him from the village. Beating him up was one thing, but throwing him out of the villages confines while he was the last known Uzumaki was not good._

_Not good at all._

* * *

The Sandaime slammed his fist into the table. Despite his old age, his aged body still managed to leave a splintery dent on the table top, scaring the group of civilians consisting of scared men and whimpering women.

_"Do you know…"_ The Sandaime whispered harshly through gritted teeth, resisting the urge to murder the idiotic fools that had cost his a figurative bombshell in the ranks of Konoha's ninja, _"…what you have just done?!"_ His fist clenched tightly, the liver spots that were on the elder man's cheek followed along with the frown on his face, bony knuckles turning a bright white while his fingertips turned red.

The snarl on his face was not helping the frightened civilian's frayed nerves.

"W-we thought we'd d-do the villa-village a favour and rid ourselves o-of the demon, Hokage-sama." A man nervously stuttered, flinching when the Hokage's head snapped towards him and his eyes bore holes into the man's skull.

_'A no named civilian, good. I will be able to teach these fools why they should never have crossed me. Especially tonight.' _Hiruzen thought to himself, intent on teaching them the reasons of why he had made that specific law in the first place.

In a flash of white and red from the Hokage's robes, Sarutobi had already appeared behind the man. Too slow to even comprehend what had happened, the Hokage drove his fist into the man's weak spinal cord, shattering it in one hit and paralysing him from the waist down. The civilian screamed while the others shouted in fright, backing away from the Hokage, who was watching the man writhe on the floor. He silently placed his sandal onto the man's neck, whose eyes were wide and was gasping out unintelligible words, and stepped down _hard_, effectively killing the man in a rather painful manner.

"The law that I created after the Kyuubi attack… I'm sure you all know what the consequence is, correct?" The old man stared emptily at the cowering crowd in his office. They nodded hesitantly.

"Do you know just how much trouble you have just caused me? Do you?" Too frightened to answer, he continued, "We have just lost our Jinchuuriki, the very same boy you beat up and threw into the middle of Konoha's vast forests as a prey for the beasts of the night."

With a single hand sign to the ANBU on the ceiling, they silently dropped down with tanto's in their hands and did not hesitate to kill the screaming civilians mercilessly on their Hokage's orders.

"ANBU, search the whole of Konoha's forest, locate the Jinchuuriki…" He paused in thought, looking at the bloodied heap of severed body parts, "And get someone to clean up this mess."

Little did the village know that this would be the moment where they regretted ever sparing the boy to the animals, wishing when it was far too late that they should have had killed him on the spot painlessly.

* * *

A 6 year old Naruto lay in a small puddle of his own blood. His arms and legs broke to prevent him from escaping the clutches of the night-prowling animals. One of his eyes was swollen from the punches the villages laid onto his face and his small body covered in dirt and cuts. He rasped tiredly, losing consciousness from the lack of blood in his body.

_'Every year, every day, every hour, every second, I live in fear. Fear of the villagers, fear of being beaten, fear of dying. But now, now I'm not scared. I'm ready to die so that I can stop being scared. Maybe… maybe my Tou-san and Kaa-chan are waiting for me in Jōdo (Afterworld), Oji-san said they died the day I was born… maybe they've loved me and have been waiting for me.'_ Naruto managed a small smile, a victory in his mind, to finally be free from the cage that separated him from the family he never knew.

Unbeknownst to the boy, the Kyuubi watched silently in his cage, listening to the thoughts of the dying child wonder about his family. He may have not liked them, but he wouldn't lie about not respecting the father and mother. He recalled them both giving up their lives to have the child and to protect him. As a he himself was a father once, he would have sacrificed himself to save his kits, luckily it was not needed they grew old and happily passed on, just like his darling wife.

He smirked. No, the boy did not deserve to die just _yet_. He could visit his parents when he was older. Kurama was sure that his parent's wouldn't mind him exacting vengeance upon those that held ill will or committed the crime of child abuse to meet their ends, more ironically by the very child they hurt. Closing his eyes, he assisted the healing process of the child by ten-fold, ensuring that he would live to make the village pay for their many atrocities against humanity.

* * *

Up on top of a nearby branch, Kisame looked down upon the boy that was in a puddle of his own blood. He had felt the presence of an overwhelming chakra source coming from this very location with the help of Samehada. He assumed it was a powerful foe, but was mistaken when he saw the child dying alone. He frowned, which exposed the corners of his sharpened shark-teeth, turning his head to the left and watching the fireworks explode, lighting up the midnight sky. The boy was obviously from Konoha, judging by the shoe prints leading forth and back from the boy's spot.

So they had dumped him, but the question was why? He mused while slowly making his way down to the boy to check if he was alright.

Samehada licked her lips from behind the bandages, taking in the scent of the delicious chakra emanating from the boy's body.

_"Gigigigigi! (What an amazing smell~!)"_

Kisame shushed his sentient blade, the very same one he had taken from his old teacher, Fuguki Suikazan, for betraying their country. He was then listed as a missing-nin despite doing his job and eliminating a traitor. Hence, the reason he was escaping from Kirigakure and was headed towards Wave Country to lie low for a few months when he had stumbled across young Naruto.

He stepped over to the downed boy, his thin black eyebrows raised up and disappeared from his slashed Kirigakure headgear from watching in slight fascination as the cuts and lumps on his body slowly receded and fixed themselves to their original flawless, but dirty, state.

'_A Kekkei Genkai?'_ Kisame wondered, for more interested in the boy. Judging by the way he was beaten up, he deduced that this was a common occurrence in the village for him, and that he would most likely join him than return to a village that did not care at all for him. He smirked, this would be interesting.

Naruto groaned, not really surprised that he didn't feel any more pain. He briefly wondered if he was in _Jōdo _with his family, only to realise that he wasn't judging from the cave he currently inhabited. His back felt uncomfortable as hell though, rocks and pebbles poking him from beneath the thin straw mattress. A small but brightly lit fire pit illuminated the grey walls of the cave, keeping him decently warm from the bone-chilling wind that would occasionally draft inwards, going deeper into the unlit sections of the cave.

"Finally awake huh, kid?" A man's voice asked him, one he did not recognize.

Naruto, fearing for the worst, leapt backwards, afraid that the stranger would hurt him. Only to be met by a hearty chuckle.

"Calm down kid. I'm not going to hurt you." The man stepped forth from the shadows, showing off his blue skin, the gill like markings on his cheek bones and his spiky blue hair. He had a, relatively, friendly grin that showed off his white shark teeth, something that scared the boy. Not to mention the giant bandaged corn-dog on the tall man's back.

"Chiageya! _(Land Shark!)_" Naruto screamed when he caught sight of the man's face, the cave echoing his last syllable loudly while the man slapped his knee and laughed harder.

"BWAHAHAHAH! Kid…" He paused, trying to regain his breath from the unintentional joke the boy told, "I like you, you're pretty funny." He said to Naruto with a smirk, causing the boy to blush from the compliment, something he had never heard before.

"Who are you and where are we?" Naruto asked Kisame, who told him his name explained to him the situation about the shark man finding the boy unconscious and bringing him into the cave due to the heavy rain, something that he could withstand, being a shark and what not, but not something a 6 year old child could without catching a cold.

"I'm Uzumaki Naruto… and I'm 6!" The boy said proudly and loudly due to his lack of social skills, seeing as he had rarely talked to anyone in Konoha, save for the old man who always seemed suspicious and shifty whenever he talked to Naruto. Kisame smiled at the boy's enthusiasm, if he would agree on following and learning from Kisame, he would definitely lighten his day just by being near the bubbly boy. He paused, before his eyes drastically widened.

_'Wait, Uzumaki?! Amazing, that village certainly didn't know what they got rid of.'_ And they certainly didn't, the Sandaime had everything and anything related to the Uzumaki clan wiped out and destroyed. The only living proof of them existing would be the red swirl at the back of the Konoha Chunnin and Jonin flak jackets.

"Say kid, have you ever wanted to be a ninja?" Kisame asked as he sat down next to the downtrodden boy, surpassing his height by a full metre. The boy would definitely make a great shinobi, with such a gigantic amount of chakra at his disposal due to his Uzumaki heritage and their apparent naturally gifted mastery over Kenjutsu since birth. He could easily teach the child some of his A-rank Suiton Jutsu's and he could easily toss them out like they were going out of style.

To his surprise, the boy started jumping all over the place, claiming that he wanted to become the best ninja in the Elemental Nations while making sound effects that sounded exactly like 'pew pew pew!' making Kisame laugh again at the boys hilarious antics.

"BWAHAHAHA!" He wiped a tear away from his eye, clutching his stomach in pain from laughing so hard. He grinned toothily at Naruto, who grinned right back, stretching his whisker marks wide apart, seeing as the man wanted to do him no harm.

"But you do know, once you leave with me, you cut all ties with Konoha, right?" Kisame suddenly turned serious, and as a child would, Naruto copied his expression and he too, became serious.

"They always beat me up, there's no way I'm going back there!" He declared, slightly angry at the village for hurting him. He promised himself that he would make them rue the day they crossed Uzumaki Naruto!

"I think we're going to have a very nice relationship, kiddo."

And indeed they did.

* * *

**Time skip: 1 year. (7 Years old)**

A 7 year old Naruto ran across the course, dodging speeding shuriken and zooming kunai's made of water thrown by his master.

"Good, Naruto! Keep going." Kisame yelled, throwing more and more water weapons, tossing them rapidly at different intervals to see if the blonde would slip up. He definitely saw improvement since the last few months of training where he had used dull weapons instead of sharpened just in case he actually hit the boy.

Which he did.

A lot.

He realised that the boy was lacking in any proper nutrition and minerals making him weak. He left the boy with a water clone, made from the nearby river, who taught him the different hand signs to cast Justus while the real Kisame was out grocery shopping.

He snickered inwardly every time a shopkeeper saw him and panicked when they thought he was a shark looking for prey, specifically, shopkeepers.

After a few weeks of eating decently, Naruto had gained some kind of mass, enough to actually cover his ribs and make him look like an actually 6 year old instead of a walking, talking skeleton.

Naruto had initially wanted to grow stronger, but Kisame insisted that he had to grow older before moving onto strength and should work on speed while he still had the time. He made the young boy run laps around their cave hideout, making sure that he was constantly aware of his surroundings by firing sharp and point objects at the scared blonde. Kisame was a hard taskmaster, but one who actually cared about him to train him to prevent him from dying so easily in the future.

Even Samehada had taken a liking to the boy, occasionally licking him to steal some of his chakra, not enough to actually cause the boy chakra exhaustion, but enough to satiate its taste for the unique chakra the boy had. Not like he was going to run out soon, seeing as he had high Jonin level reserves. Kisame had also taught him how to use smaller blades and how to throw weapons; he would teach Naruto how to use the bigger ones such as Samehada in the future when he had gotten stronger.

Naruto had actually gotten his first kill not too long ago, sure the boy had later vomited from the smell and the sight, but after that he held no remorse for the man. He tried to kill Naruto when he was injured and was escaping from enemy-nin, and had stumbled onto a sleeping Naruto by accident. Luckily for the boy, Kisame had always told him to sleep with a weapon, just in case you wake up to an enemy breaking down your door. And with hard instinctual throw, he embedded the kunai into the man's eyeball, killing him quickly.

Needless to say, Kisame was proud of him. He even bought him ramen as a celebration for killing his first vict- *cough* enemy.

* * *

**Time skip: 8 years. (15 Years old)**

Naruto dodged his master's punch, bobbing and weaving through the multiple taijutsu attacks his master sent his way. He manoeuvred left, dodging a large foot which went past his face with speed, causing his hair to be blown back from the force. Crouching low onto the grass, he swept his foot outwards, causing Kisame to jump to avoid the boy's strong kicks. Going through a chain of hand signs, Kisame grinned.

_"Suiton: Ame Yose_ _no Jutsu (Water Release: Rain Summoning Technique)!"_

As that was said, the water in the air turned to condensation and rose to the skies. It didn't take long for a large storm cloud to form above the grassy battle field. Grey cotton merged together and rain started to drizzle lightly. Kisame continued with his hand signs, targeting his B-rank jutsu at Naruto who had back off considerably. Years of fighting his master had taught him to never get close to the Chiageya when he had a large supply of water and when his hands were still attached to his wrists.

_"_Get ready you blonde punk! _Suiton: Suigadan (Water Release: Water Fang Bullet)!" _Kisame shouted, firing multiple sharpened water bombs at the boy who jumped and rolled out of the way as they hit where he once stood, blowing up the grass and kicking up chunks of mud into the air.

Naruto retorted with his own Jutsu, one he had mastered with the help of Kisame.

_"Suiton: Suikyouren (Water Release: Water Drill)!"_ Placing his hands at his chest, he forcefully shoved forwards, launching a spinning water drill that could easily rip through rocks like butter. Kisame smirked at his student's creation, impressive, but he was the one who assisted him in the making of the technique. Not to mention he was the one with more years of experience and chakra control.

"You'll never beat me with water Justus, Naruto!" Kisame laughed, quickly dashing straight ahead, right for the spinning drill. He easily leapt over it, causing Naruto to grimace, forgetting that his teacher could have easily done that. Kisame landed and rolled forwards, only to be forced to move to the side from a quick downwards slash, complimentary from Naruto's tanto.

Kisame cocked his both his fists backwards and released one of them in the form of an uppercut, one that caught Naruto's chin hard, and the other smashed into his gut soon after the first. Another quick side kick to his ribs and Naruto was knocked onto his side on the muddy grass, gasping for breath. Quite impressive that he managed to withstand his teacher's punches without even going unconscious, something he had learned from Kisame was to take a beating to last longer in battles. Without letting up the beat down he was dishing out, Kisame gave Naruto's ribs a powerful punt, knocking him away from the shark man, and landing violently at the far end of the field, splashing loudly as he rolled against the water.

"Urgh. My goddamn ribs." Naruto groaned, wishing that the Kurama would quickly mend the cracks in his usually sturdy frame.

The Kyuubi had made friends with Naruto throughout the years, meeting him first when Naruto got knocked into unconsciousness when he got his ass handed to him by his master. Eventually they had bonded close enough, leading to Kurama telling Naruto his name and about Naruto's family.

When he first heard that both his parents loved him right before they died, he broke down crying with a giant smile on his face. The blonde Jinchuuriki was incredibly elated that his parents did love him, only unable to show it due to their early deaths. On that day, he promised that he would treasure their sacrifice and work his hardest to become the best ninja in the world in their memory. When Kisame had been told that Naruto was the Jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi and the son of Namikaze Minato and Uzumaki Kushina, he nearly had a heart attack.

Uzumaki Kushina was an idol of his growing up, the _'Crimson Death of Konoha'_ was undoubtedly the most prominent and powerful Kenjutsu user in the Elemental Nations, being able to handle all of the Seven Swordsmen of The Mist at once with some difficulty. Not to mention the Yondaime Hokage, _'Konoha no Kiiroi Senkō (The Yellow Flash of the Leaf)'_, the man who effectively ended the 3rd Shinobi War with a single Jutsu, the _'Hirashin no Jutsu (Flying Thunder God Technique)._

Not to mention the Kyuubi itself was a literal force of nature.

And from that day forth, Kisame was never surprised by anything Naruto ever did again.

**"Hold on, ass-hat." **Kurama grumbled, unhappy that he was being put as a medic. He was a force of nature that destroyed mountains and caused massive amounts of untold, wanton destruction wherever he went! Not some, rib-healing little prissy pot medic.

"Nuh-uh, you're not going to get any breathing room kid." Kisame had somehow made it across the field and above Naruto without him noticing. His eyes widened as Kisame brought his fist up high, his fist coated in a gauntlet of water.

"Ah shi-"

He never got to finish his curse as the water-covered fist collided with his face.

* * *

Review and what not. He's also going to be joining the Chunnin exams under a guise of another country. Flames will be ignored.

Tell me if I should give him the any other swords/all of the SSMOFM swords.


	2. You're On Your Own Kiddo's

(10 year old Naruto)

Naruto took the piece of blank white paper Kisame had given him, staring at in in typical child-like curiosity.

"Kisame-sama, what's this paper thingy?" Naruto asked, turning the paper upside down while a small frown played on his face for not yet knowing its use. Sharp teeth gleamed slightly when Kisame gave Naruto his trademark smile/smirk.

"This," he reached behind his back, pulling out an identical piece of paper, confusing the boy further, "Is chakra paper." Kisame's paper suddenly drooped while in his fingers, dripping a single drop of water from the drenched corner of the paper.

"As you can see, it turned wet and dripped, which means I have a strong water affinity." He explained slowly, ensuring the boy could understand the explanation, which he did. Instructing Naruto to channel a small amount of chakra into it, he smiled when he witnessed the paper turn soggy before a thin black line traced itself into existence at the middle. Once it had touched both ends of the paper, it simply split into 2 pieces, falling out of Naruto's palm and hitting the ground with a small splat.

"Just as I expected." Kisame rubbed his chin, looking rather smug. He was quite happy that his student had received a higher affinity for water than wind, it would make teaching the child much easier seeing as Kisame only knew Suiton Jutsus and the occasional Donton.

"You received the water affinity from your mother and the wind affinity from your father. Apparently you're more Uzumaki than you look, seeing as how water was the Uzu's most common affinity."

"Cool! That means that I can learn your Jutsus right, Kisame-sama?" Kisame nodded, glad that the boy took an interest in his Suiton Jutsus. Maybe he was more Uzumaki in blood and Namikaze in flesh.

"Alright, now that we know your affinity, let's move on to the next topic. We already know that I will pass down Samehada if and when I choose to you. But there's no better time then now to train with her." Kisame said, gesturing to the living sword chasing a butterfly. Samehada leapt into the air and swallowed the butterfly whole with her giant maw before releasing a small burp, clearly content with the strange snack she had procured.

Whistling loudly, Samehada seemed to turn her non-existent head and looked at Kisame like a puppy would to its master. Bounding over, or as much as a sword could bound, she skidded to a halt at her master's feet and looking at him expectantly.

"Alright Samehada, I need you to allow Naruto to train with you, got it?" Kisame asked the sword who nodded vigorously.

Samehada had come to love the living chakra battery, he always stroked her despite having 'rough skin' while no one else would, quite ironic that she was named Samehada (Sharkskin) instead of Sameha (Shark Tooth). He also allowed Samehada to feed off his chakra like a drug addict, limiting her in case she accidentally overdosed and expanded. Just like that one time and they had to camp for a week in the same spot due to Samehada being the same size (and weight, but don't let her hear you say that, she gets really emotional) as a small elephant.

Picking up Samehada gently, Naruto slung her over his shoulder, prompting him to stumble backwards and fall onto his back due to the weight difference on both ends. Kisame slapped his knee while laughing at the sight of the boy being pinned down by the shark tooth sword.

"It's -urgh- not funny Kisame -urgh- sama!" Naruto whined childishly at the age of 10, grunting ever so often from trying to push Samehada off him, "You're so -urgh- mean!"

_**"This is pretty funny, ass-hat."**_ Kurama snickered in his head, finding the position of Samehada pinning his Jinchuuriki down to be quite humorous.

Kisame picked up Samehada, causing Naruto to take deep breaths from over exerting himself.

"Maybe we'll start smaller." He lifted up a medium weight tanto, to which Naruto agreed.

* * *

(13 year old Naruto and Haku.)

"What's your name?" The blond asked the pale skinned girl whose luscious black tresses hung at the sides of her face; her pink lips were puckered while her brown eyes stared widely at her bloodied saviour. In his hand was Samehada, which in turn was buried into her father's throat, effectively crushing his trachea while the rest of the men that had tried to kill her lay strewn about, most of their body parts shredded and shaven off or smashed inwards. His once blonde hair now temporarily dyed red with the blood of the fallen men, a large grin on his face while blood dripped and dropped from his chin.

He gave the girl an open, and slightly blood spattered, hand, she hesitantly held onto it while he pulled her up, 3 years of training under Kisame-sama making it easy to lift the lightweight girl. He meekly offered her a piece of cloth he ripped from a corpse to clean her now dirty hand, something she didn't notice.

"H-Haku." The girl replied with the same amount of embarrassment. She hadn't been paying attention because she had been staring into his cerulean eyes. The very same blue that she would get lost in every time they were alone in the future, not that she knew that, of course.

"Haku, that's a nice name." He said genuinely, missing the small blush on her face. "Naruto," He wry grin lessened into a small smile, "I'm Naruto."

At once, after hearing her saviour's name, she bowed low onto the ground.

"I will serve you as your tool, Naruto-sama. Please, take me with you." The girl begged while Naruto stood there dumbfounded. He had never met a girl before, but he hoped that they would not do this every time he saved one, it would get annoying really fast.

"Oi, oi, oi," Naruto frowned, disliking the way she essentially called herself a 'tool to be used', "I don't want a tool, I want a companion!" Haku looked up in surprise, caught off guard that he would want her as a friend.

"Tools break and I have no use for tools if they break easily. That's why I want to have a strong companionship with you, one so strong that it will never break!" Naruto brought his fist up and did a power pose, breaking Haku out of her thoughts.

Brought to tears by his small speech, the girl readily accepted and leap into a hug.

A sweet, sweet, bloody hug that stained her kimono red.

* * *

(Three years since meeting Haku: Same time as where I left off in the last chapter.)

_'Naruto-sama is still recovering from the spar against Kisame-sama.'_ The girl sighed, twirling her straight jet-black hair around her finger, worrying over her sleeping master. She wished that Kisame didn't go through with the act of breaking his nose again. Resetting it with the Kyuubi's help already took a long while and made Haku unhappy that she could not stare at her blonde master's face without wincing while he slept.

His pain was her pain in some way or another.

She had been very shocked when she met Kisame, calling him the same thing Naruto did when he first met the shark man. Not only that, but he was a notorious missing-nin before the Bloodline Purges had begun, being told in stories as a bedtime boogey man that would get you if you misbehaved, much to the shark man's amusement.

What? Eating naughty children was funny to him.

He had taught her different Suiton Jutsus and taught her different styles of taijutsu, one she combined together. It consisted of grapples, twirls, slashes, snap kicks and quick strikes from small sharp objects like senbons she could put between her fingers and punch with or ice claws she could create with her Hyoton jutsu.

She had chosen the name _'Dansu no Kujaku (Dance of the Peacock)'_. Naruto joked and called it the '_Dekisui Koukou (Drowning Baby Chicken)'. _Haku immediately punched Naruto into the ground and immediately apologized, however, she sounded incredibly unregretful that she did it.

Rolling back onto her bed, she groaned when the memories of her master being 'too dull', as Kisame had put it, came into her usually cloudless mind. She had hinted her undying love and devotion many time but he had either unknowingly ignored or mistook them, much to the Hyoton-user's chagrin.

The times where she would stealthily lower the shoulder of her kimono, exposing her delicate and snow white collarbone to her blonde master. She frowned inwardly when he had pulled it back up and told her that she should have worn tighter clothes. She had also shown off her tight derriere to him multiple times, opting to bend down in front of his field of vision, hoping that he had taken inconspicuous looks at the amazing cheeks through the silk fabric.

She looked down at her rather small breasts, praying to the deities that were watching from the heavens that Naruto-sama liked flat/small chests. She sighed, another day without Naruto-sama being hers.

_'Day: 1086. And still no Naruto-sama.'_ She pouted, resorting to her weekly habit. Sticking her hand into her pants and rubbing, she gave a dreamy smile and drifted off into Nirvana.

_'Mouuu~! Not there, Naruto-sama!'_ She squealed in ecstasy, dreaming of all the perverse things she and Naruto could do.

* * *

Naruto swung the giant shark sword with more ease then he did as a child growing up. Years of hard work of practice honed to an edge, he smashed the shark sword into his wooden dummy, ripping off a limb with strength alone. Haku stood to the side tossing ice senbons at multiple targets, each hitting the bull's-eye. Kisame watched his student and his student's maid/friend/companion(?) practising their work. He hadn't intended to allow the boy to use Samehada so much, but he knew something the boy didn't.

He was going to be leaving.

Kisame frowned. He had kept it a secret for a while, knowing that if the blonde knew, he would pull every card in the book to get his master and best friend to stay. But a crazy looking plant man by the name of Zetsu had recently been visiting him, requesting that he join the criminal organisation: Akatsuki.

He had declined, saying that he had his hands full being a trainer and surrogate older brother to both teenagers. The plant man had sunk into the floor, telling him should he change his mind, all he had to do was to go to Amegakure and seek out the leader, Pein-sama. Kisame quickly shooed away the bipolar mixed-coloured man and returned to sleeping his thoughts away.

That was 3 years ago.

Wanting to return to the glory days of fighting strong opponents, Kisame had decided that he would be leaving Samehada (as much as it pained him) in Naruto's care. Something the blonde was capable of doing, seeing as he had spent almost a grand total of 4 years with the shark blade. It would be a parting gift until they met again, from master to student.

Heh, maybe one day the blonde punk would be able to take him down in a 1 versus 1 battle. Kisame smirked at the idea of being beaten by his student, unable to stop the pride from welling in his chest at the greatest decision he had ever made in his life. He sniffed and rubbed the tear that escaped the confines of his tear duct.

He would miss those two.

"Naruto, Haku. C'mere, I gotta tell you something."

* * *

Naruto and Haku were, obviously, heartbroken. The man that had taken them both under his wing was going to be setting them free, continuing with his old line of work. Naruto had spent almost 10 years with the man and was not ashamed to say that he shed tears like a new born baby and leapt at his surrogate big brother, hugging him like no tomorrow.

Haku was no exception either. Kisame had taken care of her since she was 12, feeding and clothing her from the occasional bounty he gained from removing someone's head. She too, burst into tears and hugged his chest along with Naruto while Kisame smiled sadly and wrapped his blue arms around their smaller frames, still towering at least 30 centimetres despite their growth.

"Don't worry kiddos; I'll see you in the future." He reassured them, lifting their downed spirits slightly.

"A-are yo-you sure Ki-Kisame-sama?" Haku asked, sobbing, despite trying her best not to. Kisame gave her his trademark grin.

"Of course you'll see me! Besides, I'll want Samehada back one day kiddo." He smirked at Naruto who had frozen when he finished his sentence.

"Y-you me-mean..." Naruto's eyes widened to the size of saucers, surprised that his brother would entrust his prized, one-of-a-kind and only weapon to him.

"Yeah, Samehada has already taken a liking to you; why not take her for a while more, eh? Besides, if I wanted another sword I would just go and kill one of the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist and take theirs!" He burst out into laughter, prompting Naruto and Haku to do so as well.

And then they sat there, talking for the last day they would see each other until they met again, in the outside world.

* * *

Haku slung the backpack over her shoulder, supplies packed and tent kept. She turned to look at Naruto who was bandaging Samehada with practised ease, uncoiling the perfect amount of cloth to wrap the beastly sword up, which would put it into temporary hibernation. Once done, Naruto stood up and slung Samehada over his shoulder and into the sash that Kisame used to store Samehada in.

His face was full of determination and confidence, taking a deep breath and closing his eyes. Naruto could not afford to fail Haku and Kisame; one depended on him while the other expected him to return the powerful weapon after a few years of loan.

Staring out into the horizon, he watched as the sun started to rise higher, coating the visible world in a bright orange glow. From afar, the teen could see his most hated place in the whole of the Elemental Nations.

_Konohagakure no Sato._

He sneered at the great red walls that surrounded the city, cursing the place to burn to the ground. Every last one of the fool who had hurt him would pay dearly. Naruto pulled up his face mask, covering his ears, nose and mouth, leaving only cold glaciers (when not directed at Haku or Kisame) and a head of shaggy dyed red hair (which Haku secretly did not prefer over his natural blonde).

_**"All in good time, my boy, all in good time…"**_Kurama reassured him in his head, calming him down._  
_  
"Come on Haku, we're headed to Wave Country." Haku nodded, dutifully following her last remaining master even to her last remaining breath. He was the one who saved her, and he would be the one to have her swan song.

* * *

(A distance away from Wave Country)

Tazuna, Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura and Inuzuka Kiba were waddling along behind their sensei, the legendary Copy-Cat, Hatake Kakashi. Sasuke, the last heiress to the Uchiha clan paused and looked at the puddle in front of them, her eyes narrowed. Evidence to how well the girl's perception was. Kakashi himself had noticed the puddle as well, glancing from the corner of his eye and noticing the look that Sasuke gave it. Sakura and Kiba had not yet noticed the strange puddle, slowly walking behind Kakashi while Sasuke had slowed down considerably.

"What's wrong Sasuke-cha-" Sakura was about to ask when two men leaped out from the small puddle, a Genjutsu if there ever was one.

Faster than Kiba and Sakura could react, Kakashi had a giant spiked chain wrapped around him before it was violently tugged, tearing their sensei into two bloodied pieces. Kiba watched in horror while Sakura had vomited at the sight. Sasuke ran up, despite being unnerved at seeing her sensei die, and fired a volley of kunai at the chain that was travelling between the two brothers. The kunai managed to snag the chain by stapling it to the floor. The brothers clicked a button on their wrist, releasing the chain and freeing their hands before charging at the teenage girl, intent on shredding her to pieces with their poisoned claws.

_"Katon: Gōkakyū no Jutsu (Fire Release: Great Fireball Technique)!"_ Sasuke cried out, spitting a medium sized fireball at the two brothers who split apart. Meizu, the older one of the Demon Brothers, snorted and dodged the fireball easily, jumping up and lifting a hand up to slash down the wide-eyed Uchiha. But before any of that could happen, the Uchiha poofed and turned into a log, causing the slash to cause her no harm. Meizu landed back onto the floor, next to his brother, who grunted to signal his annoyance at the sudden _Kawarimi no Jutsu_.

Meizu turned to his brother, only to find one Hatake Kakashi standing in his place.

"Wha-" Meizu stopped talking, a kunai shoved right into his throat. His eyes widened before he careened for the floor and slammed his skull into the ground.

"Genjutsu might be Kurenai's specialty, but luckily I can still pull off a decent one." Kakashi muttered to himself, whistling to signal the enemies defeat. His three Genins came out of the forest with the man they were supposed to protect, Tazuna. Sasuke also held a bound up Goozu, who upon seeing his dead brother lying face down on the ground, struggled harder.

Kakashi narrowed his eye at Tazuna, walking up to him with a kunai in his hand and without, breaking eye contact, swiftly slashed Goozu's throat as he passed by him, letting him fall to the floor gurgling as he died, just like his brother. Sakura and Kiba, both who had never experienced death before, dry heaved while Sasuke gave a grimace at the man's blood on her sandals.

Kakashi cleared his throat threateningly and caused the older man to flinch.

"Now Tazuna-san… tell us what's really going on."

The older man sighed. This was going to be a long week.

* * *

_**Please review, favourite and follow if you liked it.**_

_**Reviews are really important because I want to interact with the readers (YOU) on the different choices Naruto can take.**_

_**Should he receive all of the SSMOTM swords?**_

_**Pairings? Naruto/femHaku/?**_

_**ETC?**_


	3. Ain't That a Kick in the Head

Current Rankings

* * *

Kisame - (High S Rank)  
Naruto - (Medium A Rank) (10 years with Kisame as your sensei does wonders.)  
Haku - (High B- Low A Rank)  
Kakashi - (High A Rank)  
Sasuke - (Medium C Rank)  
Kiba - (Low C Rank)  
Sakura - (Lowest D Rank Possible)  
Zabuza (A Rank)

* * *

R&amp;A (Reviews and Answers)

RygatAnime: 'Lazy' Writer who wanted to make things easier for his viewers to read without using names like 'Satsuki' or 'Sayuri'. Just take the fucking name and roll with it, it's not really a big deal. (The first thing that came to _my_ mind.)

Gizzpy: Thanks for enjoying it, it really pleases me that I know people really like it. Don't worry, Nuibari with Haku was already planned and yes, she will be very possessive. Unsure if I will make a harem because y'know, realism (Not everyone will instantly like him, Haku does because he saved her and she spent a long time with him). And yes, he will be using Samehada most of the time because she will be his treasured gift from Kisame.

BelleArcher: Thanks, but instead of think of her as a tool, he will be treating her very nicely.

Apedreitor: Unfortunately, he will be getting the rest of the swords, he won't constantly use them, but he will occasionally. I guess writing someone constantly using Samehada would be kinda boring, just like how Naruto has multiple variations of Rasengan, he will be having multiple variations of swords.

DragonPony: Sorry to say this, but my Haku feels that a master and 'servant/tool' does not deserve to be together, she (as I have mentioned) will be getting the Nuibari later on. Thanks for the compliment! She will eventually get together with him, but she will have to feel that she if worthy to make that move.

CreedRazerReaper: No, he will not be going back to Konoha. He hates it and hates anyone associated with it but it is not prejudiced, so he won't be hating people like Lee, Shino, Hinata, etc. He will be joining either Kumo or Iwa (Seeing as they don't know he isn't a Namikaze), Kiri is out of the question as Yagura is still Mizukage.

Thanks for the reviews everyone else, and like I said, those longer ones with questions will have a higher chance of being answered publicly so that I don't have to send multiple PMs to different people with the same question.

* * *

Haku stood up from her crouch on the tree, staring at what used to be left of the Demon Brothers after the wildlife had their go at them. Chunks of flesh missing, their eyes were pecked out, flies swarmed their rotting bodies and a few rats were eating their fingers and toes.

A round ice mirror appeared beside her, one could infer that it had reached an incredibly high freezing temperature as the tree the mirror appeared on had begun to freeze up as well as the bone-chilling fog that flowed out from it. Haku acknowledged its presence by stepping through it. The world seemed to invert itself before she stepped out, arriving at a completely new destination. Beside her, Naruto watched from the top of the hill as the three Genin fought against multiple bandits while their Jonin instructor, Kakashi was fighting a bandaged man, one Momochi Zabuza, the _'Demon of the Mist'_.

Not as cool as Kisame, _'The Tailed Beast without a Tail'_, Naruto felt. Haku readily agreed.

A man Naruto recognized merely from the sight of his blade.

The Kubikiribocho.

One of the swords the Seven Swordsmen wielded. Kisame had given him all of the information about all of the swords, their abilities and who their current wielders were.

Kubikiribocho had the ability to absorb the iron from the blood of its enemies, healing and repairing any cracks, breaks or shatters in the sword. No matter how much of the sword was broken, all one needed was the handle and enough blood.

And Naruto wanted it.

The Jonin he recognized as well, Kakashi the Copy Cat of Konoha, the man with a thousand Jutsus, all copied with the sharingan he kept under his eye. Naruto didn't know the man personally, but hated it when people stole the hard work of others without working for it.

Moving his gaze across to scan the 3 genins, he thought to himself.

_'That pink haired one. Completely useless'_ Naruto declared mentally as he looked her over. Judging by her stance and the way she held her kunai like she was trying to eat with it instead of stab someone with, he could easily tell that she was the weakest link in the group.

He moved on to the fur-jacket boy with the dog beside him and red markings on his face. Inuzuka, Naruto had determined. Dangerous in close ranged combat from their rather powerful and destructive clan techniques. This boy was not really a threat in Naruto's opinion.

Lastly, he stared at the symbol at the back of the rather beautiful tomboy. The Uchiha Clan logo proudly displayed on the girls back, almost like she was begging to get killed telling the world that she was the LAST Uchiha, or she wanted to get kidnapped and turned into a baby factory.

Naruto had studied up about the clans from the bingo books that Kisame would bring him. He then read up all about the village that he hated with all his might, just in case one day he might have to fight against the very same clan members he had read so much about. He had already planned out how to defeat each and every clan that resided in Konoha. Luckily for him, the whole of the Uchiha clan, sans Sasuke, had been wiped out entirely by Uchiha Itachi, the female prodigy of the Uchiha's, which was very ironic. That would make things so much easier for him as he did not have to deal with those 'shifty-eyed bastards', as Kisame had called them.

He watched in slight fascination as the Uchiha spat a fireball at a clone of the Demon of the Mist causing him to evaporate into steam. He chuckled when a bandit socked the pink haired girl in the face, causing her to stumble backwards and black out from the pain.

_'These kids are so fucked,'_ Naruto smiled, _'I'll have to get Haku to bail them out I guess.'_

"Haku?" He asked his masked assistant, "Do you mind helping those little punks?" Haku nodded obediently, a slight frown behind her white porcelain mask at being asked to help the people from the very village that mistreated her master. She also did not like how his eyes lingered on the duck-haired bitch. Her eyes burned with hatred, glaring holes into the girl's chest. The Uchiha (C-cup) had at least 1 cup over Haku (A-cup), making her feel incredibly jealous. She clenched her fist and narrowed her eyes at stealing her master's attention from her (Which he wasn't, he was just analysing them). Almost as if sensing her jealousy, he put a reassuring hand on her face, despite it being covered by a mask, he gently glided the back of his palm against the smooth porcelain, making the girl blush heavily behind the mask even though skin contact was not made.

"Don't worry Haku; they will be paying very soon." Reassured, Haku summoned an ice mirror and stepped through it while it closed immediately after she stepped into it, reappearing on a nearby tree branch beside the three genins.

Turning his head to Kakashi and Zabuza, who both looked worn out, Naruto masked his chakra and hid nearby to watch the two fight.

* * *

Staring at the pathetic display and excuse of a shinobi from behind her hunter-nin mask, Haku sighed and shook her head as the Inuzuka ducked under a small cleaver, delivering a decent hay-maker to the bandit, knocking a few teeth out of his already empty mouth. She sighed even harder as she saw a perverted bandit try to sneak away with the unconscious pink haired 'kunoichi'.

_'Why, Naruto-sama. What have I done to warrant such cruel acts placed upon me? Babysitting a bunch of wannabe ninjas is torture!'_ She groaned, chasing after the disgusting male. Creating three senbons between her index, middle and pinkie fingers, she landed directly on the man's shoulders and quickly plunged the sharpened and chakra-strengthened senbon into his neck, spine and brain, causing instant and painless death to the rapist. She would have prolonged the man's suffering were it not for the awakening pink haired girl.

"Owwww. Hey, who're-" before Sakura could continue any further, Haku delivered a vicious snap kick to the girl's temple, knocking her out instantly.

"Hush, cur. Go to sleep." Haku whispered to the unconscious pinky. She picked up a few leaves and dropped them over Sakura's unconscious body under them. Stepping back to enjoy her camouflaging skills, she stared at the clearly visible body underneath 5 leaves on her face.

"There, done. I clearly did my best and have nothing more to offer." The raven haired beauty said in the most serious voice she could manage. Clapping her hands together to rid them of non-existent dirt, she leapt back to help the other two in trouble.

* * *

"Damn it! Where the hell did Sakura go?" Kiba yelled to his teammate/rival while ducking from an angry man with a bandana and a frying pan. He gave the man a kick to the gut while Akamaru bit his overly large nose, digging his sharpened teeth through cartilage and drawing a gush of blood.

"GAAHHH, MY NOSETH ISTH BLEEDING!" Sasuke smacked the man at the neck, dropping him like an unconscious sack of potatoes... if potato sacks could be conscious in the first place. Leaning to the right Sasuke avoided a hand stabbing with a dagger to her face, grabbing and snapping the wrist with both hands before throwing the man over her shoulder going "AAAAAIIYEEEEE". She failed to duck an out stretched arm that grabbed onto her hair and pulled her, causing her to yell out in pain and for Kiba to help her out.

Giving the man yanking his rivals hair a good drop kick to the face, he was clubbed at the back of the head by another burly fellow who was missing an eye. Lifting up the wooden club high, the man was about to crush Kiba's head like a grape when a cold, blue senbon found its way jammed into his forehead and right into his brain.

_'Brain freeze'_ Haku smirked at her own little joke, something she knew Naruto-sama would burst out laughing if his humour was any indication.

She rolled her eyes when she heard the dog boy whining about being in pain, _'ha! Naruto-sama got hit so hard by Kisame-sama once he accidentally snapped his ribs. All of them! Shrugging it off before puking a lot if blood. And here this little bitch thinks he's in pain?'_ Haku gritted her teeth in frustration at how pathetic the Konoha boy was.

Lodging a senbon in a spot next to his neck, the dog boy found himself unable to move or speak, the chilly feeling that someone was behind him would have made him shiver if he could move... the chilly feeling was also emanating from his weak spot. Kiba watched in frozen (literally) horror as a girl in strange clothing and a porcelain mask came up behind Sasuke, too slow to turn around, Haku drove a fast knife-chop into the back of her neck, knocking the Uchiha heir out immediately. The Inuzuka panicked, this chick just appeared out of nowhere and paralysed him and knocked Sasuke out, clearly they were dealing with someone out of their league.

Haku lifted Sasuke up and slung the unconscious girl over her shoulder, grabbed the jacket collar of the wide eyed boy, she dragged him along to their 3rd unconscious teammate whose knocked out body was still covered by the leaves. Unceremoniously dumping the two of them onto the ground, Haku stood up and left, turning her head to the side to address them as she continued walking.

"My master is waiting for me. You can move in a few minutes, go and find your sensei after you are free." Leaving the 3 genins behind, she created another ice mirror and stepped through it.

* * *

Kakashi was running dangerously low, using the sharingan and multiple chakra-heavy jutsus had left him running ragged. Zabuza was in no better condition, for he himself had blood dripping from the gash on his forehead and had small cuts throughout his body, courtesy of Kakashi's smaller blade.

He heaved the giant cleaver into the air, slamming down into the ground, cracking it in a show of strength. Kakashi was not fazed by the act, he just noted mentally to not get hit by that again. He glanced downwards at his jonin vest where the blade had glanced him, a giant slash when it had ripped most of the durable material off in a single cleave.

'Definitely try not to get hit again.'

"Looks like you're on your last leg _Copy Cat_, don't worry, I'll be sure to bury you properly since you gave me such a good fight!" Zabuza shouted, telling himself that he would not lose without giving up a fight.

Kakashi gave a laugh at that.

"Don't worry _Demon of the Mist_; I'll be sure to collect the bounty on your head after I'm back in Konoha." Zabuza gritted his teeth in anger. How disrespectful! Not even Zabuza would have stooped so low after fighting such a good opponent, and would have buried them properly. Such was the way of the Seven Swordsmen. Kakashi smirked behind his mask when he saw that Zabuza got mad at his retort, his bandaged hand clenching Kubikiribocho tightly.

"Fool, for that comment, you don't even deserve the honour of being buried and mourned. I bet not even Raiga wouldn't cry at your burial!" And with that, Zabuza charged, intent on cutting down the disrespectful shinobi.

From the shadows, Naruto frowned at Kakashi. Kisame had drilled it into his head that the 'survival of the fittest' was the way of life and had some times told him that burying the opponents that gave you a good challenge was a sign of good faith to the departed. The man shark hated arrogance, only using it on the battlefield as a way to annoy or to poke the person into bursting out in a fit of rage, causing them to slip up.

This Kakashi fellow would prove a problem for him in the future and would be easier if he just killed him now. Naruto narrowed his eyes temporarily, already choosing his decision, there was no honour in finishing off already wounded future-challenges such as the Copy Cat and the Demon of the Mist, so he would wait until they were healed up before fighting them.

Before either man could continue, Kakashi's wounded and tired genin emerged from the forest while Zabuza's bandits came to get their boss.

"C'mon boss, we gotta go! Gato wants to see you." One of them shouted before helping Zabuza leave, Kakashi watch as the bandits left with the un-reluctant man, unable to stop them due to chakra exhaustion. He dropped to his weak knees and passed out, Kiba and (a bruised) Sakura ran up to assist their sensei while Sasuke frowned and subconsciously rubbed her neck in pain. Embarrassment burned in her ever since Kiba told her a girl appeared and instantly knocked her out after she had paralysed him. No Uchiha could stand being shamed in front of someone, it did not

Sit well with their clansmen. Of course, only power and pride would. Ignoring her wounded pride, she clutched her neck and reluctantly followed Kakashi, turning to look behind her every so often.

Behind a nearby tree, Haku sniggered, teleporting away with the use of her ice mirror.

* * *

Naruto squatted on the thick branch while Haku leaned against the side of the trunk, both silently watched the cottage the ninja were staying in. It used to belong to a fisherman who had fought against the corruption of the town, Gato. Haku decided to break the silence by asking a question she had been bottling up for some time.

"Naruto-sama, I don't mean to question you... but what exactly do we do after this?" Haku asked as politely as she could, hoping that her master was not upset with her.

"Maybe I'll collect all of the Swordsmen's blades after beating them." He paused, adopting a thinking pose, "I'm sure Nuibari would suit you perfectly, it is beautiful and fitting you being an agile and elegant fighter and all."

Haku blushed deeply at the compliment, holding her burning cheeks and replaying the comment in her head.

"Of course, after that maybe we'll join a Hidden Village... perhaps Iwa? Or maybe Kumo? Suna is too hot, Konoha is bleh and Kiri is in the bloody civil war I save you from." Naruto shrugged,clearly unconcerned, "As long as you're with me, I'll be fine."

Naruto had meant that in a friendly way, Haku took it rather seriously, smiling dreamily and drooling from her mouth.

_'Ehehehe~~! Naruto-sama needs me! Kyaaaaa~!'_ However, outwardly, Haku coughed softly, turning her head away to keep her master from catching her face that seemed to have immolated. She was certain that if she tried to summon ice, she would only melt it from the amount of heat she was radiating.

Unbeknownst to his blushing companion, he continued speaking, "Anyway, the main goal is essentially either the total destruction of Konoha and deafeating the Seven Swordsmen of the Mist and taking their blades for myself and anyone who I deem worthy to weild them."

Haku nodded, glad to finally get goals. This made it much easier to assist Naruto-sama and his endeavours.

"We will camp nearby Haku, I spotted multiple herbs on the way here." Naruto said, turning and leaving with Haku faithfully in tow of her master. Naruto narrowed his eyes as he walked, thinking about the day while Haku had split off, looking for herbs in her civilian outfit.

_'Konoha shall feel my wrath. Be it in this life, or the next!'_

* * *

Kakashi lay in the bed in Tazuna's guest room. He was thinking about what his students had told him. A girl or very feminine boy had attacked and knocked them out, but did not kill them. Kiba had said that the senbon she sent into his neck had melted into water after a while and that she smelt very faintly of foxes.

The Cyclops jonin suspected that it was a Hyoton user, incredibly rare but not an impossible factor, that or it was a master at Suiton and Fuuton jutsus, which would be someone incredibly difficult to deal with. With the ability to cut and sweep, Fuuton and Suiton combined was definitely a formidable force to deal with, especially since both combined would form Hyoton.

"Great, just great. Another damned threat to deal with." Kakashi sighed, rubbing his temples with his index and middle fingers. Feeling that it was time to go to sleep, he did. It was a long day and he had chakra exhaustion, he really didn't want to deal with this when he woke up.

* * *

Sasuke, Kiba and Sakura backed away from the door, surprised that they had overheard their jonin sensei suspect out loud that they were facing a possible Hyoton user or a master at both Fuuton and Suiton.

"I need to activate my sharingan to copy that bitches moves." Sasuke cursed, jealous that her stupid traitor Itachi-nee-chan had unlocked her own when she waz 8. Kiba smirked, slightly happy that even his rival couldn't upstage him.

Well, he couldn't either but that's not the point.

"Ha! Bet without those stupid eyes of yours, you're practically useless!" He taunted the fuming Uchiha, who answered him violently with a fist to the gut, causing the Inuzuka to keel over, clutching his injured organ.

"Urghhhh." Kiba groaned, clearly in pain after invoking the wrath of the FEMALE Uchiha.

"What was that, Kiba-kun?" Sasuke tilted her head adorably, a cute 'what was that' look on her face before it contorted into a vicious sneer at the moaning boy.

"That's what I thought, Shit-Eater." She spat at his downed form, storming away to the girls room. Sakura grimaced at both of them, following Sasuke soon after.

"Damn it, stupid stuck-up bitch." Akamaru barked at Kiba's collapsed body, nudging the jacket-wearing boy with his wet nose. Crawling away like the dogs his family owned, he rolled onto his bed, falling asleep soon after, completely unaware of the porcelain mask that stared at him from the ceiling, vanishing in a reflective pool of ice.

* * *

Chapter End.

(Kakashi vs Haku vs Zabuza) (Naruto vs Sasuke, Kiba (Akamaru) and Sakura) in the next chapter which may be uploaded tomorrow or on Monday (cause y'know, Chinese new year and shit, gotta go out and meet people I don't want to and take their money because I'm a teen/young adult).

A slight preview of Haku vs Zabuza vs Kakashi

* * *

"_Hyoton: Hyoketsu Fīrudo (Ice Release: Freezing Field)." Haku's voice seemed to bounce throughout the air, echoing despite all of them standing in an open field. The bitter cold started to affect both men, causing them to shiver under the feeling of an artic storm. The clouds quickly turned grey, almost unnaturally if the speed they changed colours was a clue._

_"Ondo… (Temperature…)" She muttered under her breath as the storm clouds boomed, both men were so entranced in watching the sky that they forgot to move, not even noticing as their breath started to turn visible and that it was getting harder to breathe._

_Drips of rain fell from the sky, plipping and plopping softly onto both men's heads._

_"Gekigen… (Dropping…)" And with that final word, all hell broke loose._

* * *

Please review if you liked the story and what not!

Questions for the viewers.

Should Naruto and Haku join Iwa OR Kumo and the reason why? (Iwa doesn't know he is a Namikaze, Kumo will find out he's a Uzumaki due to him containing the Kyuubi.)

Once again, I thank you for your reviews, favourites and follows.


	4. A Shower of Senbon

R&amp;A (Reviews and Answers)

* * *

**Kumo outweighed everyone who had other opinions **: THEY'RE GOING TO KUMO! WHOA!

**NAFNAF509**: Flashbacks will cover the past in chunks, the only reason I did such large time skips was because some people complained that they wanted to see what the current Naruto was doing now and I sort of agreed. He basically trained and hung out with Kisame/Haku and that was pretty much it. Some OMAKES will be happening with flashbacks.

(NOTE: IF YOU HAVE IDEAS FOR OMAKES, SEND IT IN A REVIEW AS A CHALLENGE OF SORTS AND I'LL TRY MY BEST TO DO IT. IT CAN BE IN THE PAST WHEN NARUTO IS WITH KISAME AND HAKU OR THE CURRENT TIMELINE.)

**Setsuna911**: Naruto tasked Haku with the challenge of testing her abilities against stronger ninja, seeing as how she herself trained with Kisame and Naruto who went slightly easier on her. This is also an opportunity for me to write some fucking cool abilities (that I totally did not steal from a videogame *cough*_dota2_*cough*_crystalmaiden_*cough*) that she can pull out of her butt that'll impress you guys (the move, not the pulling out of her butt).

**KuroiSenkou**: Submissive Haku will swap between Seductive Haku when the mood is right, she'll still believe Naruto is her master even as they're in a relationship (which happens in this chapter, or at least a confession from Naruto to Haku since she would never make the move).

**Banjo the Fox**: You don't just say 'disappointing chapter' and then don't tell me what made it disappointing. You have to tell me so that I understand and try to correct it in the future. If you're 'disappointed' at the fact that Kakashi did not side with Naruto in the last chapter or in this, you'll be disappointed yet again because Kakashi doesn't know him, let alone side with him. Naruto doesn't even give a shit about Kakashi at all. Did Kakashi raise him? No, Kisame did. That's why he cares about Kisame more than Kakashi.

And yes, he _may_ be joining a Daimyo in the future due to certain events that will take place in the future.

* * *

Recently, Kisame-sama had sent a shark summon to deliver Naruto a strange cloak. The shark told Naruto that Kisame just told the messenger to send it to his surrogate younger brother without saying anything else. After delivering the package, the shark summon swam away, thankful that he had found the boy near water.

_'Black cloak, red clouds. Looks pretty damn cool if I do say so myself. I have no idea why you gave this to me, but thank you, Kisame-sama.'_ Naruto looked at the cloak before looking at his old Kiri hunter-nin outfit. Shrugging, he put it on; unaware of the significance it would play in the times to come and the lives it would affect.

* * *

Sasuke and Kiba's day had gone very well, they woke up, went to the toilet to get changed, ate breakfast, started practising their tree-climbing exercises near Sakura and Tazuna at the bridge just in case they got attacked by bandits, and then they got attacked by a red-headed teen with a giant bandaged sword.

Yeah, everything sort of went downhill from there. Sakura was tasked (to the best of her already limited abilities) to escort Tazuna away while the other bridge builders escaped for their lives. Sasuke and Kiba had been tossed around by the sweat-less red head who insisted on fighting them to, apparently, 'test Konoha's little soldiers'.

"Well, is this the best the two of you got?" Naruto taunted the panting boy and girl, they assumed that the annoying smirk still stuck on his face but could not confirm due to the mask he was wearing. What irritated the Uchiha and the Inuzuka the most was that he didn't even sound cocky, but rather cool and collected. Almost as if they weren't even a challenge to him, which they weren't, but they didn't know that.

"Damn it." Kiba cursed under his breath, and grudgingly turned to his female rival, who was also in the same predicament as him.

"Uchiha, got any ideas?"

Sasuke grunted, a frown marring her usually 'drives-hormonal-teen-boys-and-lesbian-girls-crazy' face. She hated being bested by others, especially when her opponent was the same age as her, and Sasuke herself was supposed to be the number one Genin in the whole of Konoha. It was an insult to the Uchiha name to be so weak in front of comrades or friends.

Though, a part of her silently prayed that the mysterious red head didn't use the giant bandaged blade on his back. The same bandaged blade that he seemed to carry with relative ease despite being almost twice his size.

"Well, if you're done coming up with a plan..." The red head leaped forwards, spinning in mid-air while he swung his leg out during mid-flight. Too slow to dodge the quick movement, the reverse spinning kick landed on Kiba's cheek, splitting the inside of his cheek open and flinging him against the side of the bridge wall. He cried out in pain when he connected to the concrete, his back injured from landing on the hard edge.

Sasuke bent down and brandished a kunai from her leg pocket, spinning in on her index finger in an attempt to scare Naruto.

Naruto snorted at the sight of her little show. How exactly would the opponent be scared if you could twirl a kunai on your finger?

"_Oooooh~ scaryyy, the ability to twirl a circular object connected to a knife on your finger."_ Naruto mocked the ever-louring teen. Seeing as it did not work, Sasuke frowned deeper and turned the spinning kunai into a reverse dagger grip, preparing to strike the annoyingly strong red head down with a fatal strike.

With a simple and swift kick to the wrist as the last Uchiha approached, he effectively disabled the still standing Konoha shinobi. A quick motion brought his knee into Sasuke's toned stomach and before the Uchiha could even blink, he had already uncurled his leg sideways like a whip and struck her cheek hard with the roof of his foot and shin.

"Gah!" Sasuke cried as softly as she could in order to protect her broken and dying pride. The kick had bruised her pale and beautiful cheek painfully, Sasuke narrowed her eyes and grit her teeth, her eyes filled with obvious murderous intentions towards the red head who, she assumed, continued smirking from beating the Uchiha's ass soundly.

Kisame-sama would be proud of him. That much Naruto knew.

Sasuke, who obviously did not learn her lesson, ran back towards the red head who had crossed his arms and was checking the nails on his left hand, an act that Kisame-sama had taught him to rile his opponents up. And it worked of course, especially on someone who feeds off on pride and dignity, someone like Sasuke.

Angered by the pillory, the duck-haired girl added chakra to her legs to give her the needed 'oomph'. She did not expect Naruto to suddenly appear in front of her, faster than she herself was with chakra enhanced legs nor did she expect the quick punch to the gut, the left shoulder and the right side of her ribs. The punches had left her slightly crippled as the strength behind them had effectively made it hard to move them without feeling her muscles screaming. Naruto did the same kick he had performed on Kiba, instead of hitting her cheek again, he planted his heel into the solar plexus of the last Uchiha, knocking her away and onto her back while she spat spittle and blood out.

Naruto cocked his head at the sight of the two downed ninja, sighing at the sorry-state of the village that had intended to do him harm as he grew older.

"Man, if this is the level of Konoha shinobi, I won't have to worry a thing during the Chunnin Exams." Naruto joked. He wasn't even a genin yet, let alone a chuunin

'_This guy isn't even a chuunin? What the hell?!" _Kiba and Sasuke thought together at the same time, clearly feeling the invisible pressure from the much stronger opponent being placed on them.

"Oi, Shit-Eater, formation B!" Sasuke shouted at the dog boy who growled when he heard that name but nevertheless complied with her demands. Leaping forwards, he jumped and twisted in mid-air so that his feet faced Sasuke's chest, he landed on her open palms which she pushed forwards while he kicked off, shooting him with incredible speed at the red head who was watching the circus act with curiosity.

The honestly expected something as simple as that to beat him?

The Inuzuka stretched his hands forwards, nails ready to dig into the red headed boy's flesh.

The only flesh that he had dug into was the knee that dug into _his own_ flesh, his chin to be precise.

"Ghrk." Kiba choked as the knee connected, snapping his once open jaw shut. A breakneck (to the two genins) punch cracked his bottom left rib causing him to gasp, lifting his leg up and pushing the boy away from him, causing him to land next to Sasuke's feet.

"Okay, I'm not going to lie," Naruto shook his head negatively, "That was pretty sad."

Sasuke snarled, stepping over her downed comrade. Going through the hand seals that she was the most familiar with, she stopped, placed her mouth at the tiger sign.

_"Katon: Gōkakyū no Jutsu (Fire Release: Great Fireball Technique)!" _She shouted out, chucking a large chakra enhanced fireball at the masked teen, who ran through his own sign in a flash.

_"Suiton: Suikōdan no Jutsu (Water Release: Water Shark Bullet Technique)!"_ A translucent blue shark that dripped water blasted out from his hands, a silent roar on its face as it dived for the fireball. They crashed in a show of hot steam, blocking both fighters' view and preventing vision on both sides.

"Shit, this isn't good." Kiba muttered while holding onto his ribs, something Sasuke could agree on. She did not expect that move, especially his reaction time to the sudden ninjutsu move. It was quick and fast compared to hers, almost like he whipped it out while she had slowly performed it like a child would. Shoving aside her shame, she jumped high, kicking off Kiba's chest, who had shouted indignantly at having the action perform on him, and back flipped away while Kiba fell on his ass. The large bandaged sword had swiped the steam away from the area and had almost connected to their chests.

Sasuke cursed her luck, mentally giving Kami a 'fuck you'.

Whatever it was, there was probably a very good reason _why_ it was bundled up in the first place.

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" A shrilly voice pierced the air. Naruto turned around and saw Sakura running up from behind, intending to distract him while her teammates attacked. She was quickly booted in the face, making her fall down backwards, and 'golf-balled' away after falling to the floor and getting smacked with Samehada like a golf club would to a golf ball. She got some air-time before crashing into a tree, knocking her out again. Her body was going to hurt like hell, especially for a weaker kunoichi who never trained, when she woke up.

"FORE!" Naruto snickered at his own joke, clearly pleased at the result of the improvised attack.

"Sakura!" Both teammates shouted, both wondered why the idiot had charged in like that, unaware of her intentions to distract him while they attacked. Naruto grinned at all three's stupidity.

"Look, it's been fun kiddos… but we've got a country to liberate."

Turning around, he jumped and spun his kick in a 180 degree, kicking Kiba and Sasuke hard enough to rattle their skulls and knock them out.

"Hmph, that was a horrible test, you guys failed pretty badly. But, I guess we'll play again when you're _actually_ going to put up a fight, see ya." He two-finger saluted the unconscious bodies before vanishing with his red cloud cloak billowing in the afternoon air.

* * *

"You! You're the one who attacked my students." Kakashi narrowed his eyes and leaned low, a kunai in his hand ready to throw or stab with. Haku did not reply the man, preferring to stay silent behind her mask. Zabuza looked surprised at the sudden appearance of the girl, choosing to be wary of the teen if his opponent, the Copy Cat himself, had found her as a threat.

"My master has tasked me with being live tested by powerful ninja. I will not fail him after he has entrusted me to complete my task." Haku tossed senbon at both men, causing them to split and dodge as the rain of frozen ninja weapon.

"What the hell?! A Hyoton user?!" Zabuza was in disbelief, he had assumed that they had all perished during the Bloodline Purges in Kiri. He was now slightly hesitant at wanting to kill the girl/androgynous boy. If he could capture her, he could put a seal on her to wipe her memories of her old master and replace them of one with him, getting him the last Yuki clansmen in existence on a leash.

Haku silently turned to Zabuza, eyeing the large blade her Naruto-sama wanted. Although she understood that testing herself against two A-Rank ninja was the main goal, the bonus was the Kubikiribocho. She reminded herself that Naruto-sama would not want her to be returned in two pieces, something easily achievable by the over-sized cleaver which could easily cut her in half. Although, thinking of the reward Naruto-sama would give her made her lick and bite her pink round lips sexually.

Shaking herself out of her reverie, Haku decided to use her biggest gun in her first move.

_"Hyoton: Hyoketsu Fīrudo (Ice Release: Freezing Field)."_ Haku's voice seemed to bounce throughout the air, echoing despite all of them standing in an open field. The bitter cold started to affect both men, causing them to shiver under the feeling of an invisible artic storm. The clouds quickly turned grey, almost unnaturally if the speed they changed colours was a clue.

_"Ondo… (Temperature…)" _She muttered under her breath as the storm clouds boomed, both men were so entranced in watching the sky that they forgot to move, not even noticing as their breath started to turn visible and that it was getting harder to breathe.

Drips of rain fell from the sky, plipping and plopping softly onto both men's heads.

_"Gekigen… (Dropping…)" _And with that final word, all hell broke loose.

Loud whistles signified the fast approaching projectiles that dropped from the sky like rain. Senbon, shuriken, icicles, blocks of ice, all fell from the sky, each varying in different sizes and shapes, intent on smashing someone's skull in or impaling another.

Kakashi widened his eyes, leaning to the right to dodge a giant icicle, approximately the same size as he, that whizzed past his skull. Zabuza was no different, instead of a single icicle however, a storm of ice shuriken the same size as his fist came bearing down upon him, choosing to use Kubikiribocho in a futile attempt to block the rain of pain, leaving his legs wide open for Haku to attack.

Slightly drained of her attack, that was still going on, she dodged her own icicle rain, summoning three senbons between her index, middle and pinkie finger on her right hand while her left had a Pantera claw, ready to strike Zabuza's glaring weak spot. She gracefully dodged the kick that Zabuza had directed to her face, sliding underneath the extended limb with her knees and bringing the senbon straight up while the claw went for his other leg.

"ARGH!" Zabuza screamed as the senbon embedded themselves into the calf he used to kick her with while the leg he was standing on was viciously slashed, cutting through the black pants he wore and leaving three bloodied scratches.

The young ice user came out from the other side, only to be bashed at the ribs by Kubikiribocho's blunt edge when Zabuza swung it around to hit the girl. She gasped as she felt one of her ribs break from the weapon but persevered through the pain and turned around.

_'I can't die here, not when I haven't even taken down one of them,'_ She thought while holding her injured side in pain, casually leaning to the left to avoid a giant ice shuriken that found its way next to her, _'Naruto-sama put his faith into me, I can't let him down!'_

A large icicle slammed into Zabuza's exposed thigh, causing the man to scream in pain as he was stuck to the spot, unable to break free from the sharpened ice spear.

The one-eyed jonin decided to capitalise on the injured Zabuza, trying his best to avoid the ice shrapnel that had broken off on impact and buried themselves into the floor, jutting out like sharpened nails while avoiding the still raining-deadly-ice-objects cloud. Too bad luck wasn't on his side as he felt a large amount of ice shuriken land on his vest, weighing him down slightly, just enough, for him to crash land on some of the shrapnel. His arms dripped of blood as pieces of ice thumbtacks were stuck in them, causing the jonin to grunt in pain. He'd have to clear out most of the ice to continue forwards.

_"Katon: Hōsenka no Jutsu (Fire Release: Phoenix Sage Fire Technique)!"_ Kakashi spat multiple balls of fire through his mask. Easily burning through the grass, ice shards and falling hail in a second with the jutsu's great heat. Kneeling down on the wet grass, he pulled up his hitai-ate, showing off his spinning sharingan and charged up his signature technique, the _Chidori (One Thousand Birds)_.

Zabuza widened his eyes, unable to move from his spot on the floor, unable to swing Kubikiribocho in time to sever the blitzing Kakashi whose fist was engulfed in a bright white-blue of lightning.

_'Damn it, at least I die with dignity.'_ Zabuza closed his eyes, accepting death with imaginary open arms, seeing as he wanted to die holding onto his blade. Haku watched in baited breath, waiting for Kakashi to strike Zabuza down.

_***thump***_

Zabuza keeled over and dropped to his knees then to the floor when Kakashi released him, good as dead after the Chidori-engulfed fist entered his chest and exited from his back. Haku and Kakashi ignored each other as they silently mourned the loss of an honourable enemy in battle while the storm cloud slowly dissipated.

Kakashi was still going to take his body for the bounty though, his Icha Icha didn't pay for itself y'know.

"Well, that was great, Haku." Haku flinched, suddenly turning to face her master despite the agonising pain at her side.

"N-Naruto-sama! I'm sorry I have failed you." Haku tried to bow, shame filling her features behind the mask. Naruto placed a hand on her shoulder, stopping her from bowing. He wasn't disappointed at her, in fact, her was more than impressed. She had exceeded his expectations and impressed him greatly. Saying you stood your ground against the Demon of the Mist and Konoha's Copy Cat was already a great achievement in his book.

"Come, let us take our prize and leave before I check up on your injury." Haku blushed heavily again despite the situation, the idea of taking off her shirt for Naruto-sama was just too sexual in context for her not to imagine him taking in the sight of her topless.

With great ease, he picked up Kubikiribocho, throwing it high into the air while he quickly brandished Samehada, pointing her upwards. The bandages loosed enough for the sentient sword to open her mouth, swallowing the giant sword as it came back down to earth. Ignoring Kakashi's wide eyed disbelieving look when he had heard Haku address the teen as 'Naruto-sama' and the giant sword-eating sword he wielded.

What were the chances this could be the same boy the Hokage tasked all jonin and chunnin's to look out for on their missions.

_'Blonde hair, nope. Whisker marks, unsure. Blue eyes, check.'_

He re-imagined most of the boy's looks in his head, changing the teen's hair colour and removing the face mask that was similar to his, placing whisker marks on his cheeks. His eyes widened, could it be? Better safe than sorry.

"Wait! You with the sword, what's your name?" Kakashi demanded, brandishing a kunai despite being slightly tired.

"Me?" Naruto looked around comically, trying to find the person he was talking to, his eyes widened before he dropped the act, narrowing coldly at the Konoha nin.

"Currently, it doesn't matter what my name is, what matters are your little genins that I beat up, you might want to look for them before bears eat them or something." He shrugged, gently scooping up Haku (who gasped at the intimate action) in his arms and vanishing into a whirl of water.

Kakashi growled, turning around to locate his, hopefully not eaten by bears, genin, mentally noting to inform the Hokage of the boy that shared traits similar to one Uzumaki Naruto who was officially listed as dead but was labelled as missing off the record.

* * *

"That's _a lot_ of money." Naruto whistled, admiring at the large, stacked, pile of cash that reached from the floor to the ceiling. Haku, as usual, stood by his side like a loyal guard dog would for her master, her eyes scanning any visible threats in the vicinity, seeing as how they were in the 'man who sucked Wave Country dry's' house. Naruto sniffed softly, pulling out a scroll and sealing a large portion of it away with the help of a Mizu Bushin.

One very specific reason why people rarely used clones now-a-days was because of the side effects of them dispersing. When they dispersed normally, one would retain about 5% of the information they received for the clone, barely remembering the other 95%. Not only that, but if the clone was to die from say, a kunai, you would receive the information that you got killed by a kunai flashing through your head, almost like a burst of powerful killing intent due to actually seeing yourself die, this would be incredibly dangerous to use in battle and should only be used as a final gambit. _**(Authors Rant: See how I effectively crippled the use of clones because it's so fucking stupid to have Naruto visit a library and clone himself a million times to read every single book and becoming a smart motherfucker. So no Naruto 400 clones, split them up to master techniques easily or pile on an opponent, NO. THAT'S. FUCKING. STUPID. Anyone who writes that way is kinda lazy in my opinion. Not only that, but people constantly use the clones as scouting tools, which is also very stupid, so why the fuck not surround Naruto with hundreds of clones to effectively make sure no one is around.)**_

Haku assisted her master silently, picking up piles of cash and delivering it to the hardworking clone and master who accepted the cash and sealed it away in multiple sealing scrolls. Creating another Mizu Bushin, he commanded them to return to their hide out and bury the scrolls underneath his and Haku's bed before dispersing.

He moaned in satisfaction, stretching his back and enjoying the popping sounds his spinal column made from a hard day's work of stealing money from the richest man in Wave. He had left a quarter of the money behind, effectively stealing 75 million ryo from both the country and the corrupt businessman. If Naruto were to retire now, he would have enough money to support Haku and himself for the rest of their lives and the next.

"Good work Haku, we'll leave the rest for the citizens, but we'll have to get rid of the pests first." Naruto smiled vanishing in a burst of water while Haku created a mirror beneath her and vanished through the floor.

* * *

They appeared outside a door, which Naruto promptly kicked down with his powerful legs. Rearranging Samehada on his back to a more comfortable position, Haku and he walked in sync to the large oval shaped conference table. At the far end of the table, a man with scraggly hair sat, two samurai standing by his side while other brutes and thugs watched the two teens.

"Hmph, just because you think you have a big sword, you think you can kill my men and me? Kill the kid, but take the girl for your own amusement." Gato smiled, expecting the man to break down and beg for forgiveness and offer the girl as a tribute, one he would accept, only for him to kill the man and take the girl anyway!

The men stared at Haku's lovely hips, licking their lips at the idea of holding onto those curves while they pounded her repeatedly, her weak and broken voice begging for them to stop only for it to be filled with another throbbing and hungry meat-stick which would find its way down her throat rapidly, filling her stomach and womb up with their sordid sperm before selling the babies she made away as sex slaves or labourers. Of course, just like their past victims, Haku wouldn't be able to get the peace of death, no, they would pound her until she died from exhaustion or pain. Even then, they would desecrate her remains, ejaculating all over her corpse and tossing it into the ocean.

Naruto's hand tightened onto Samehada's handle, growling at the sight of some of the _vermin_ grabbing their hard crotches. Haku placed a soothing hand on his arm, causing him to relax slightly. Secretly, she thanked the way those men looked at her; it made her Naruto-sama incredibly jealous!

_'Naruto-sama is so protective of me! One step closer to being Yuki Uzumaki Namikaze Haku! Kyaaaa~!' _While Haku was busy fantasising about what colour her wedding dress was going to be, Naruto had addressed the men that dared to stare at his Haku.  
_  
_Yes, _his_ Haku.

"With your very corpses, I will wipe the floor clean of the blood I'm about to spill from your bodies." The men shivered slightly at how cold and deadly his voice was, turning to Gato, his blue eyes turned artic and frigid, "And I'll make you eat your guts through your nostrils." And with that being said, he vanished in a burst of speed.

Heaving Samehada from over his shoulder to right in front of him, he smashed the giant sword into the table, flipping it over and giving it a good, hard kick. The table top spun and smashed into most of the men, shattering and coating them all in splinters. Swinging Samehada with great ease, he smashed a foolish man with a knife in the stomach into the wall, coating the bandages with his blood and organs as he was violently separated from his lower half.

Haku did not stand around as well. Slipping on her trademark porcelain mask she started tossing senbon out left and right, nailing targets in their brains, eardrums, tendons and vital organs. Her eyes darted from target to target, flicking with her nimble fingers and destroying the painfully slow men. The vermin dropped like flies while more replaced them.

_"Hyoton: Sōzō no Hyo (Creation of Ice)."_ Haku, with her mastery over ice, froze the very moisture around her arm, something she had been practising for many years and took a lot of chakra to accomplish. Her arm turned into a claw that had long and pointy fingernails. The hardened blue ice sparkled as she raised it up, imagining the way it would later shine in the blood of her enemies.

"I thank you for making Naruto-sama jealous, however, fantasising about me being raped comes with a heavy cost…" She pointed the fingernails at them, "I hope you're ready to pay the price." The men cowered as she charged; intent on gouging out the eyes that had mentally undressed her.

* * *

Naruto slung Samehada back onto his back sash, having changed the blood-soaked bandages with the help of a Mizu Bunshin. The two samurai that were supposed to protect Gato were lying on the floor with their bones broken and their lives ended painfully.

"So, Gato, shall I move on with how I'm going to make you eat your intestines from your nose?" The man whimpered as Naruto slowly stepped closer, stepping over the dead body of the fallen samurai and standing in front of the crying man.

"Please, I'll give you all my money, just leave me alone!" Naruto laughed after hearing his pleas and begs, lifting a foot up and planting it into his side, punting him across the room.

"Scum like you do not deserve to live. Luckily for you, I have just the treatment for that predicament." The red head's smile turned positively cruel.

"No, NO, PLEASE STOP, I CAN'T- **ARRGHHHHHH! NO, PLEASE, STO-AAAAAAAAAHH!**" Naruto had lifted his leg up, using his full strength; Naruto crushed both of Gato's legs like toothpicks. The bones snapped with great ease and would not be recovering anytime soon. He changed the position of his feet from Gato's legs to his shoulders, and with another two hard steps, they too shattered. Being in so much pain, Gato's brain shut down, turning him into a vegetable.

Certainly not one you would eat, probably one you'd throw away judging by it's rotten looks.

"There we go, much better than eating your organs right?" Naruto asked, not expecting an answer from the now comatose man, "Hey now, stop all that crying and turn that frown upside down." Naruto chided the tycoon while he foamed at the mouth. Haku walked up beside her master, her trademark porcelain mask slightly splattered with blood.

_*FLUFF WARNING*_

"Naruto-sama, the castle has been cleared out. All valuables have been taken and stored in _our_ home." She coughed, hoping Naruto did not catch her dreamy voice when she said 'our'. Naruto smiled warmly at her, leaning into her mask and making the teenage assassin fluster under his gaze.

"Good work Haku-chan," She did not miss the sudden addition of the suffix, her face reddening further beneath the porcelain glass that separated her face from his. She mentally cursed that she had picked this to obscure her identity when if she hadn't, she could just… lean in… for a… kiss. She strained her muscles and forced herself from jumping her master right there and then in front of a slightly brain-dead Gato, which wouldn't be very romantic.

Naruto, however, slightly lifted up her mask from below, giving him sight of her from her sharp chin up to her cute little nose. Haku diligently stared forwards, her pupils vibrating, not even daring to look her at her master from the corner of her eye. He smiled when he saw one of her reddened cheeks, enjoying the sight of her lip trembling slightly.

The teen leaned in,

_**'chu'**_

**'!'**

_'KYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~!'_ Haku's inner mind squealed loudly, smoke comically exiting her ears while her eyes turned into swirls usually seen in Manga and anime of the far future, _'NARUTO-SAMA KISSED MY CHEEEEEEK~!' _Inner Haku cupped her burning cheeks and smiled happily,_ 'YATTA! HAKU:1 UCHIHA BITCH:0'_

On the outside, Haku coughed while Naruto leaned back out from her cheek, a small happy smirk plastered on his face.

"T-Thank you for gra-gracing m-me with your li-" She shuddered violently while attempting to say the word, forcing a look of painful impassiveness on to her beautiful face, exhaling a quiet 'oh sweet heaven,' before continuing, "lips, Na-Naruto-sama."

Haku had thought that he had never noticed the subtle signs that she had been giving him while they were together with Kisame. Times where she would insist on climbing up trees he sat under while she wore a skirt, flashing him her cute white-blue striped panties or when she would insist on washing his back, claiming that 'a master should never wash his own back as long as he has an extra pair of expandable hands,' When she had said that she was expendable, Naruto had given her an earful and forced her to swear that she would never see herself as a dispensable and replaceable person again.

Or that one time she had, out of the blue, informed him in the later parts of the three years with Kisame that, according to the world organisation that ran the Master/Servant guild (or at least the one she had made up), the master _must_, she had stressed very strongly, have sex with his servant if he only has one, a hidden look of sexual depravity in her eyes that Naruto did not miss. He had politely shot her down, saying that it was improper of a lady like her to force herself into doing something she did not want to. He smirked inwardly when his sharp ear had caught onto her mumbling 'damn it' before she walked away, choosing to please herself with a smooth stone she had found outside whilst moaning her master's name. Something that Naruto had also heard with his powerful hearing.

But damn it all, he just loved teasing the hell out of her, placing subtle innuendos he was sure she would interpret correctly, turning his usually calm and collected Haku into his flustered, shivering and perverse Haku.

"Don't be so formal with me Haku-chan, you know I don't like that." He mock pouted while taking a senbon and gently shoving it into Gato's neck, paralysing him. Using Samehada, he scooped up Gato's broken body and used Samehada and Gato as a bindle.

"Besides…" He looked over his shoulder, his blue eyes sparkled with warmth directed at the ice user who blushed at his caring gaze, "You're mine, right?"

Haku stiffened before dropping backwards, fainting on the spot. Naruto gave a short sigh at the girl's reaction to his confession; see as how she herself would never confess due to her feeling that a servant was not worthy of being together with their master, no matter how much Naruto tried to beat it out of her head. Hell, he was going to make her confess by trying to hit on another girl to make her snap and claim him as hers but felt that that was too cruel.

Shrugging, he walked over and picked up the softly snoring girl, trying his best to balance Gato on Samehada, Samehada herself and Haku, who was being carried like a newlywed bride.

An unconscious newlywed bride, but still one nonetheless.

* * *

"OI! PEOPLE OF WAVE, COME AND GET THE PIECE OF SHIT THAT'S BEEN DRAINING YOU DRY FOR THE LAST COUPLE OF YEARS!" Naruto shouted at the top of his lungs, tossing Gato onto the wooden floor of the stage, the very same he had stood on when he executed Kaiza publicly. The citizens of wave immediately stopped and stared at the broken body of Gato at the feet of Naruto and Haku. They cheered, crying tears of joy at finally being liberated, many getting up on stage to thank their saviours and to kick Gato.

"By the way, the money that he stole is in his base, we could only find 25 million ryo unfortunately. He seemed to have spent the rest." Naruto told Tazuna who looked slightly suspicious at the pair who had attacked his escorts.

"Well, we're leaving. Come on Haku-chan, I've decided, the voices in my head have told me that Kumo is the perfect place to go!" Naruto turned and walked away while Haku chased after her boyfriend/master.

"Wait up Naruto-sam- I mean, Naruto-kun!"

She was still having a hard time believing that they were in a relationship.

* * *

Sarutobi Hiruzen stared at the newly listings in the bingo book, hoping that he could retrieve his weapon back with the multiple squads he sent out to search for the pair. Having the last Yuki in existence could prove useful to him. Unfortunately, by being a girl, it would take a much longer time to impregnate instead of a boy who could impregnate many kunoichi's at once. He'd have to look out for Naruto as well, he was growing into a threat that soon even he couldn't stop. The Sandaime wondered where he could have gotten so strong and how he did so.

_Name: Yuki Haku._  
_Age: Unknown.  
Appearance: 13-17, Porcelain Kirigakure Hunter-nin mask, long black hair, slender frame.  
Village: Supposedly Kirigakure  
Nickname: 'Suishou Shojo (The Crystal Maiden)'  
Ranking: Low A-Rank.  
Abilities: Hyoton Bloodline, able to summon a storm of ice to slaughter hordes of enemies, agile fighting style and dangerously accurate with senbon.  
__  
__Notes: Fought against Zabuza 'The Demon of the Mist and Kakashi 'The Copy Cat' and managed to wound both, impaled Zabuza through the leg with an icicle._

Threat level: Is considered very dangerous.

Konoha  
Dead: 50,000,000 ryo.  
Alive: 150,000,000 ryo.

* * *

_Name: Uzumaki (Assumed) Naruto (Confirmed)  
__Age: Unknown._  
_Appearance: 13-17, Red hair, Black cloak with red clouds, face mask that covers ears, mouth and most of the nose, medium body-size with muscles.  
__Village: Supposedly Konohagakure  
__Nickname: '?'  
Ranking: High A-Rank - S-Rank.  
Abilities: Powerful Suiton affinity, able to make water out of air despite not being near a source of one. Assumed to be an Uzumaki member due to red hair. Assumed to rival the Nidaime Hokage in terms of Suiton Affinity._

Notes: Currently in possession of two swords, one unidentified large bandaged blade with a mouth and one of the Kirigakure's 'Seven Swordsmen of the Mist's' blade, Kubikiribocho. Able to carry and swing both with great ease and hold them as though they are weightless.

Threat level: Is considered incredibly dangerous.

Konoha  
Alive **only**: 500,000,000 ryo.

* * *

Kisame smirked as he read the newest additions in the black booklet, biting through the claw of a crab as his eyes scanned through the page.

_'So it looks like Naruto has moved up on the 'social ladder' eh? Even getting the Kubikiribocho from Zabuza. Hehe, little Haku-chan has grown too. These kids, they grow up so fast! I'm so proud of them!' _He crunched on the claw loudly, his stoic partner stared at him with a pair of red eyes as he read, unaware of the thoughts in the blue man's head, _'I see he wore the Akatsuki cloak I sent him. Hopefully he doesn't get in trouble with the boss for doing so. It would be a real 'pein' if the boss sends us after him.'_ Kisame laughed at his own joke, confusing his partner further.

"Kisame-san, let's get a move on shall we?" His stoic partner asked politely, causing Kisame to swallow the rest of the crab whole. He crunched it loudly, smacking his lips in contentment.

"Hai, hai, Itachi-san, let's." The shark man stood up, heaving the dead body of the shinobi they were tasked to capture to collect the bounty on his head for their organisation. Kisame had no idea what they were doing with so much money, but he liked the company and the thrill of chasing down other dangerous shinobi.

* * *

Chapter End.

* * *

Now that (almost) everyone has chosen to go to Kumo, that's where our lovely adventures will take us!

Review if Naruto should get more companions, male/female, if they should receive a Swordsmen blade in the future or not, I'm thinking of a _teenage_ Mei, because y'know, red heads are hot and Mei is pretty fucking badass with her own Bloodline.

LAVA, SHE CAN SPIT FUCKING LAVA. And she's from Kiri too!

Or maybe a younger, _less dead_, Pakura. She'd be fun to write, especially since Scorch Release is under-rated.

* * *

_(Preview of the next chapter: To Kumo, We Go!)_

_The target wrapped his large sweaty arms around her waist, pulling her in and making sure she understood what he needed by placing her amazingly soft rear on the hardening in his pants. The man dug his oily nose into her neck and inhaled her amazing scent._

_"Peaches, I love peaches." He was allergic to peaches, but what's a little lie going cost him? Haku smile warmly, leaning deeper into the slimy man's hug._

_"Oh really? You do? What else do you like about me?" She smirked playfully while she escaped his grasp, turning around to show the seated man her lascivious outfit. A short, frilly, black miniskirt and a mix between a corset and a French maid outfit, (barely) covering only her abdomen and, as she herself put it, budding (small), chest, leaving her shoulders, arms and (whatever small amount of) cleavage open for show._

_"Well, I like how beautiful you look," Inwardly she rolled her eyes, Naruto-sama could have come up with a better compliment to describe her radiant beauty, "I like your warm exterior… but I'm more interested to know what's beneath the 'exterior'." He winked as seductively as he could at her, causing Inner Haku to cringe at the sight and at his pathetic pickup lines._

_Swallowing her disgust, she bent down forwards, giving the man a good view of her breasts while her hands started travelling all over her body, rubbing over her (budding) breasts and in-between her leg valleys, giving off a soft gasp when she touched her moist panties before bringing her hands back up to her chest. Stopping halfway at the buttons of her corset-maid outfit hybrid, she slowly unbuttoned, causing the man to lean forwards, licking his lips savagely while his eyes were bulged._

_"Beneath my warm exterior…?" _

_She undid the last button while holding her dress in place; she smirked at the way men would bend around her finger so easily. Too bad Naruto-sama would require some coaxing and embarrassment to come out of his shell before him too bended like the rest of them._

_She pulled apart her shirt, causing the man to instinctually grin. That grin soon dropped into a 'what-the-fuck' look at the sight before him, his eyes showing his mass confusion and hysteria. Haku's entire body or at least the parts that were covered by the strange clothing was completely translucent and blue, almost like… ice._

_"…Permafrost."_

_And with that, her body started to glow a brilliant, bright blue, one that swept throughout the whole room before, in a split second; everything turned an eye-blinding white._

_The man never got to experience losing his virginity that night, instead swapping it with his life when Haku's entire body exploded into a flash freeze of glacial coldness. Instantly freezing the man and the entire room they were in in a coat of (-273.15 degrees Celsius) ice. The look on his ice encrusted face showing his despair at dying a virgin… that or you know, seeing a girl with a body made of ice._

_Faraway, Haku shivered when he Hyo Bunshin killed itself, taking out the assigned target Kumo had given them in the process. She'd have to wipe her mind clean of the memory of some greasy vermin touching her… she smiled, perhaps Naruto-sama was free tonight._


	5. To Kumo, We Go!

Hey, I haven't updated this fic in a while. Probably because of my other fics.

Anyways, just a small chapter for them to get to Kumo.

There's a bit of action before they arrive at Kumo, nothing much but them moving forwards. Next chapter will more than likely have the preview from the last chapter, where prostitute Haku kills a pedophile.

* * *

"I can't believe that you guys caught us. I can't help it if Haku-chan wants to moan when I kiss her." Naruto grinned as he blocked a kick from an Iwa shinobi, lifting his forearm to intercept the shin aimed at his head. "Damn patrols, you guys can fuck right off."

He snorted and twisted his arm, grabbing the -obviously newly christened- Chunin's leg with the arm he used to block. Naruto formed a single hand sign on one hand before it changed into a fist, slamming the balled up hand into the Chunin's knee, shouting his technique as the fist made contact.

_"Suiton: Teppoudama (Water Release: Bullet)!"_

Naruto was so experienced in using the technique that he could project the bullet in any part of his body he chose; which in this case, was his fist. It was a very useful skill for dealing with weaker opponents. Many large rocks had met their end at one of Naruto's most basic skills, a mere C-rank capable of breaking stone and tearing thin steel walls.

The teen was clearly a new Chunin as an experienced one would have tried fighting Naruto off, but all he could do was watch dumbly as his entire dominant leg, or everything below the knee, was blown off violently. The fist sized water bullet smashed through his kneecap, flesh and bones, destroying the limb forever. Even if it were to be reattached, the leg would still be rendered useless with how ruined it was.

"AAAAGHHH!" Luckily for the screaming Chunin, who had been released from Naruto's grasps due to losing his leg, he could easily get a fake leg and he could still go on with life without much problems. His shinobi career would be all but ruined, but hey, at least he could still do D-ranks for the rest of his life, or maybe he could watch the gates of Iwa. Such a life would have driven any dreamers, those serious in wanting to become the respective Kages of their villages, to fall into deep depression and eventually, suicide.

Naruto watched sadly as the Chunin hopped around on his literal last leg, his other reduced to a bleeding stump.

Unfortunately for the man, he wouldn't be getting a fake leg. After all, it wasn't as if corpses still needed their legs.

Naruto didn't know why, but the Chunin had been holding onto a kunai for the entirety of their rather brief fight, Naruto supposed that the teen was trying to perform something else after the kick had his leg not get blown off. The teen looked as if he had finally decided that he wanted to die dragging Naruto to hell with him, choosing to lunge at Naruto with his one leg kicking off of the leaf covered floor, kunai prepared to stab Naruto's heart.

The teen screamed, blood leaking from the corners of his mouth, "If I'm dying, I'm taking you with me!"

"Sure thing, buddy." Naruto yawned, looking mighty unimpressed with his final gambit.

So it came as no surprise to everyone who knew Naruto personally, that the Chunin was found dead, pinned with a kunai to the thick trunks surrounding the area by his neck.

* * *

Haku on the other hand, was dealing with her opponents swiftly, dispatching them by the droves with her mirrors. The icy reflections surrounded the ten men from Iwa, all of whom guarded each other's backs, some whimpering while others bravely staring the Haku's that appeared in every mirror down.

"H-How can she u-use Hy-Hyoton?!"

"I thought the bingo book was lying!"

"Impossible! Hyoton users were reported to have been wiped- Ack!" A frosty needle slammed into his throat, stopping his speech. Even worse, another one was flicked, and like a master of archery, the second ice senbon slammed into the butt of the first one, piercing through his neck and hitting his spinal cord, dropping the man to the ground, permanently paralysed and as useful as a meat shield.

"Damn it!" One with an eyepatch cursed, forming a few simple hand signs. "Doton: Iwa no Kougeki (Earth Release: Rock Attack)!" Thrusting his palm forwards, a flurry of large rocks flew straight towards the mirrors, intent on shattering them with the stones. Unfortunately, it proved to be a poor idea as the mirrors held strong, bouncing the rocks backwards.

Once, she was vehement about killing and abhorred the very idea. As a child, she felt that murder was what was wrong with the world, what corrupted it, changed men into monsters, an example being her father. The man that loved her and her mother turned on both of them the instant he found out she possessed the Hyoton after the Mizukage began the Bloodline Purges. When she had been cornered, about to be murdered for holding onto a piece of her mother inside of her, Naruto had saved her. Slaughtered them all, he did.

Haku watched uncaringly as the rocks returned back to their user, the man unable to form hand signs fast enough was crushed beneath the weight of rocks, unable to dodge them due to the constricted space. He, alongside two others, were now one with the earth, much like their home village.

But now it was simply second nature to her, like breathing or blinking, it was something that never mattered or weighed down on her mind. Because that day, she learned that if you didn't kill, they'd just get up and repeat their actions. Had Naruto not saved her, she and many others would have died to her father and the mob. In some ways, the Mizukage was right, there needed to be purges, the purges of the unclean and wrong.

Well, those that were considered as wrong in Haku and her master's eyes.

Out of the corner of her eye, she watched as Naruto kicked a Chunin into a tree before savagely using the man's own hand, which was holding onto a kunai, to stab himself in the neck, pinning the shocked body to the tree trunk.

"Goodbye, it has been a pleasure entertaining you. Perhaps in your next life, you would think twice attacking Naruto-kun and I." She formed a single hand sign, years of training allowing her to do so.

The air the mirrors surrounded began to lower in temperature, Haku using her chakra to cool the moist air, turning the moisture in the air into a stinging cold. Rapidly, the temperature took a nosedive as the winds began churning and spinning inside of the mirror dome, reaching into the negative numbers at an unnatural rate. The men began to shiver uncontrollably, their thin clothes not helping them from the sudden change of climate in the slightest. Their breaths were visible, coming out in puffs as they clutched their sides and fell to their knees, no longer able to stand up straight as their joints seemed to turn brittle and caused massive amounts of pain just by putting pressure on their knees.

_"Hyoton: Hie Kaze (Ice release: Chilling Wind Technique)."_ Haku whispered, her voice hauntingly beautiful in the midst of the dying brown grass and faltering men who were hanging onto consciousness by a thread.

As quick as a finger and thumb could snap, the temperature dropped once again, but only for two seconds at most. That two seconds was all it took to immediately kill the men, putting them out of their frosty misery as their insides seemed to freeze up from the unbearably cold winds.

The mirrors promptly vanished, evaporating back into the air, save for one, which Haku stepped out of.

Strangely, even with the intense heat from the sunbeams that came from the top of the trees through the leaves, the air that the mirrors had contained was still freezing and would stay that way for another day at most. The corpses would eventually rot from the humid temperature that were the borders of Iwa and Kumo once the cold left, so she didn't have to clean anything up. Nature would take its course, allowing the bodies to either be eaten by animals, or turn into compost for the plant life to use.

Naruto-kun was still the midst of dispatching another group of Iwa ninja in style, choosing to use Kubikiribocho in order to get used to the blade. Samehada was still strapped to his back, giving him the fearsome appearance of monstrous man capable of holding onto both swords despite his medium sized frame.

She sighed dreamily as Naruto spun in a circle, smashing the blunt end of Kubikiribocho into three ninja's, breaking their arms and ribs on impact. Naruto had taken her out on a date last night, and despite both of them having zero idea on how dates were like or what they were supposed to do on dates, she would have to say that she had massive amounts of fun. They had hit up a lot of different towns, going through the casino's that they had and bleeding them dry with Naruto's extreme luck. After that, they stopped by each of the town's best restaurants and ate to their hearts content. And when their night came to an end, it was then Naruto had given Haku a lovely kiss to end their night, both of them falling asleep in each other's arms in a snuggle fight that Haku had won, locking her forearms behind Naruto's head and forcing his whiskered face into her bosom. Naruto had gladly obliged, wrapping his arms around her waist and falling asleep in the growing chest of Haku, who was blushing madly at the action she performed in the heat of the moment.

Thought embarrassed, she was glad that Naruto had told her that he didn't care if she either as flat as a board or had melons hanging off her chest. To him, she was Haku, and that was all that mattered.

'Now,' She pulled up her mask, allowing it to sit on the top of her head, uncovering her flawless face, 'I just have to figure out how to move onto the next step with Naruto-kun.'

* * *

Naruto, on the other hand, was casually dealing with the onslaught of shinobi, all of whom backed off whenever he faced them, wary of his massive cleaver. Each of them wanted to take Naruto's bounty, which unfortunately meant that he had to be taken in alive. The Yuki girl was being dealt with by their other comrades and could be taken in to Iwa for forced breeding. Having soldiers with the powers of ice and earth would bolster their already tight defence forces.

"I see that glint in your eyes," Naruto started conversation with the men surrounding him, "You're thinking about my sweet Haku-chan, right?" Without allowing them to answer, Naruto's charged, uncaring about his safety, as he headed straight for the one in front of him. With strength unmatched by any of the men in his presence, Naruto cleaved the man from head to pelvis, splitting him in half.

Continuing his assault, Naruto spun after killing the last man, swinging his blade and allowing Kubikiribocho to viciously take off both of a man's legs.

"AAAAHHGH!" He screamed, falling to the floor as his legs were separated from his body.

Naruto grinned as he raised the giant cleaver up into the air, a mad smile on his face. "Watch your step," He chuckled at his joke, bringing the blade down onto the screaming man. "It's six feet down." The man was soon dead; his head separated much like his legs. One of the people in the crowd puked at the sight, unable to stand seeing his comrade killed so brutally.

"Aw, don't do that." Naruto grimaced, looking directly at the one who puked as he casually dodged another shinobi who bravely and foolishly rushed at him with a kunai. A quick knee to the side of the gut rendered his ribs fractured while a haymaker thrown at the man's face caved his nose inwards, knocking his bloodied teeth straight out of his mouth.

"C'mon, you're a shinobi; you can't have a weak stomach. Death is an everyday thing." He spoke normally as he thrusted Kubikiribocho forwards, catching one man in the gut with the blunt tip of the weapon.

"See," Naruto gestured as he swung Kubikiribocho past the man he knocked in the stomach. While at first nothing seemed to have happened and they thought he had missed, suddenly a spray of red came from his gut, and his organs spilled out in a heap, landing at his feet. "This guy has the stomach… and liver, and intestines and kidney-"

"-Naruto-sama, we're going to be behind schedule if you keep making jokes about every person you kill."

Naruto sighed as his loyal girlfriend appeared from above, staring upside down at him and his foes from the underside of a tree branch, him pouting at the ice user sadly, wanting to stay and have fun. Haku merely pointed a dainty and manicured finger up to the treetops, where the harsh afternoon light was soon coming to an end, and would bring about dusk which meant that they had to climb a mountain in the dark. Not wanting to go and trek up a mountain in dim moonlight when he could be using the daylight to do so, Naruto admitted defeat.

"I suppose you're right, Haku-chan." Looking back to the men, he sighed, "I guess we won't be playing anymore, but I just want you to know that I had a lot of fun. We should play again sometime."

Naruto crouched lowly before kicking off the ground, leaping a good five metres up into the air by condensing chakra into his legs. Watching as Naruto began forming a long chain of hand signs, the men tried to counter whatever technique he was trying to accomplish, but they were too slow against the student of the Land-Shark.

_"Suiton: Suikōdan no Jutsu (Water Release: Water Shark Blast Technique)!"_ They tried running as Naruto's palms blasted a giant shark outwards, the creature ripping through whatever branches got into its path. The shark made quick work of them, shredding those that got too close to its jaws and blew those who tried to run away apart. Casually, Naruto slammed Kubikiribocho onto the ground, embedding the sword by its blunt end. Pulling Samehada off his back, Naruto opened her mouth up and allowed her to swallow Kubikiribocho fully, keeping the other blade inside of Samehada. With a grunt, Naruto slung it back over his shoulder, holstering it with ease despite its weight. His partner dropped from her position, landing quietly on the floor beside Naruto.

"Let's try not to attract any more attention, eh, Haku-chan?" Naruto grinned, slinging an arm over Haku's delicate shoulder, and due to his height, began rubbing his cheek against her temple, purring in content as his whiskers made contact with her skin.

The girl smiled happily, leaning into his one armed hug as they strolled through a destroyed forest that sat on the border of Iwa and Kumo, littered with body parts and gore. "Hai, Naruto-kun."

* * *

After a few hours, the pair successfully traversed the side of the mountain that led to the pathway to Kumo. Upon seeing the first walls of Kumo, the decision was made to camp out under the stars, wait for morning and then continue their way to the Raikage. The next morning, after a lot of cuddles and peeks from Haku when Naruto was changing, the pair made their way to the gates of Kumo, the rest of the village on the mountains disappearing into the clouds. It looked a lot like what one could only describe as 'God's Staircase' with how the sun shun through the puffy white sky.

They were quickly halted by a team who introduced themselves as Team Samui, the girl with the blonde bob cut, enormous and barely covered breasts and stoic face was obviously Samui, the leader, with how she held herself. Her team consisted of another girl and a boy, both of whom looked similar. Naruto guessed that they were cousins or sister and brother.

The redheaded girl with the white Kumo bandana was pretty feisty and loud, which made Naruto feel like they were long lost family. Judging by her hair and temperament, Naruto would have guess that she was partially Uzumaki if the stories from Kisame about his mother rampaging on the battlegrounds were true.

The boy on the other hand couldn't stop talking; his paranoia and exaggeration over Haku and Naruto went through the roof, thinking that Naruto was the son of the man he accidentally bumped yesterday on a mission to Yugakure and that Naruto was here to reinstate his father's honour by slaying Omoi and that Haku was a girl who fell in love with the Kumo shinobi during said mission, following Naruto in order to convince him otherwise from killing her one true love, Omoi, who she would later marry and have sixteen children with. All of whom would later become the next Raikage's.

Haku punched him in the gut for even thinking that she would bear him children and not Naruto-sama, dropping the white haired boy face first into the dirt groaning, and Karui actually thanked Haku for doing so. After a whole spiel of events, including a lot of gentle staring from Samui to Naruto, who seemed to be mentally removing Naruto's clothes, they finally made it to the Raikage's office, bringing them to their current time and place…

"So… You want to join Kumo, huh?" The large muscular man stared Naruto and Haku down, his only article of clothing being the unbuttoned white cloak that showed off his ridiculously large pectoral muscles and, much like many of Kumo's inhabitants, his mocha skin. His light blonde hair, nearly bordering on white, was gelled backwards, down to the nape of his neck and his moustache twitched with interest. Having the last Uzumaki and Yuki in their village would definitely be a plus, not to mention the fact that the boy was also the wielder of both the Kubikiribocho and the Samehada.

Darui, A's right hand man and bodyguard, looked interested in the pair, especially Naruto due to the two special, one of a kind blades he held. Kumo was obsessed with Kenjutsu even more so than Kiri, who only had the Seven Swordsmen. Kumo on the other hand, taught every one of their shinobi how to use swords of all kinds.

Pulling his mask down and showing off his face, Naruto leaned forwards and shouted directly at the Raikage's face. "Yeah, and if you won't let us, I'll kick your ass!" Shaking his fist threateningly, Naruto leaned into the Raikage's face not fearing the man's reputation as the 'Fastest Man Alive' and his towering size.

A smirked as Haku slammed a fist onto Naruto's head, sending him to the floor. Darui, Karui and Omoi behind them looking amused as Naruto got manhandled by his girlfriend.

Samui on the other hand, could help but feel slightly jealous at the sight of the red head hugging Haku's ankles, begging for her not to hurt him anymore. Quashing the sudden feeling that bloomed in her very healthy bosom, Samui quickly tuned back to the conversation Haku was having with the Raikage.

"-And you will not be taking either of us for your 'breeding programmes'. Am I understood?"

"Who do you think you are," The Raikage glared at Haku, crossing his large banded arms across his chest, looking down at Haku as he slowly stood. "That you think you can command the-GAAHHH!" The Raikage yelped in an unmanly fashion as Haku's hand whipped forwards and yanked on his ear, twisting it and nearly pulling the man over the table. The girl's face was calm and had a polite smile on her face, she herself leaning on the table with one hand, the other on the Raikage's ear. Bringing her face right into his, the grown man shivered in fear.

_"What did you say?"_ Haku's voice was an eerie and horrifying murmur, the little girl resembling the large muscled man's mother, a beast that was untameable until the woman met his father, the previous Raikage, and even then the beautiful woman still kicked her husband's rump until her early death. Everyone in the room watched in awe as the man was brought into submission, yet no one helped as they feared Haku's ear-twisting abilities and also because the Raikage wasn't in any real danger.

_"I'm sorry, I must have misheard you."_

"Ow! Yes! I said yes!" Haku released the man, who instantly shot back to his seat, cowering at the sight of Haku as he rubbed his sore ear.

"Glad to hear it Raikage-sama." She hid her lips as she gave a girly giggle, "I sincerely hope we don't have a repeat of that again." Then her eyes resembled the chilly moutaintops of Yuki no Kuni. **_"Because n__ext time, that ear is coming right off."_ **Haku leaned back and her demeanour returned to normal, the girl leaning down and yanking Naruto by the collar back up to his feet.

"I'm so glad I saved you that day, Haku-chan." Naruto sighed happily, kissing Haku's temple. "I love strong women so much." Samui frowned while the Raikage cleared his throat, slightly embarrassed that he had been made a fool in front of his Shinobi, but didn't dare do anything lest he make the Yuki turn into his mother again.

"Ahem. As I was saying, this isn't all you need to do to become a Shinobi of Kumo. There are two missions that both of you need to take, one for each of you. Upon competition, you will become Genin-" Haku raised her hand, forming a crab claw and pinching the air.

Gulping, the Raikage amended his words, "-Chunin," Haku nodded, "And will have Kumo's protection from outsiders." Then he shivered and gave Haku a discreet look that nobody missed, "Though I seriously doubt you need it. We'll also need to address the problem which is your Jinchuuriki status. I'll have my brother and Jonin come and help you control the Kyuubi's transformed states."

Naruto grinned, "Sweet. When do we start on both?"

"Tomorrow. While your Jinchuuriki training is whenever Kirabi and Yuugito come back." Then A pointed to both of the wannabe-Kumo shinobi, then Team Samui. "Both of you get to stay with them." Then, in order to regain his lost pride, A slammed his fist into the table, breaking the wood in half and scattering the neatly arranged paper everywhere. "Now leave, this paperwork doesn't do itself!" Mabui, his assistant, sighed as she began picking up the pieces of paper. Naruto and Haku waved goodbye to the Raikage before leaving the room with Team Samui.

* * *

The five of them walked down the streets of Kumo, about to reach the junction where it separated the market from the housing, the border represented by a large fountain. "So, how'd you get the-" Omoi coughed before whispering discreetly as if he were a child and was saying a bad word, "-Samehada?"

Naruto stared at the shorter boy, grinning beneath his mask, "Oh, this baby? I got it from a friend."

Omoi stumbled at the answer, he had expected an epic story about him fighting off Fuguki Suikazan at Kirigakure and how he managed to beat the giant orange haired man when he held the scariest blade between the Seven. Omoi had assumed he used a smaller blade against a man with such a large one, choosing speed and accuracy to combat strength and size. Maybe he could have even gotten a few tips for Kenjutsu about smaller swords, which he specialised in, and see what moves he could learn from Naruto to use against opponents with bigger swords.

"Eh?!" Omoi mouth dropped, "Y-You got Samehada from a friend?!" Naruto simply nodded, looking at him with the same amount of enthusiasm.

"Crazy right? He just walked up to me and went, 'It's dangerous to go alone, take this!' And then bam, I've got myself a badass sword." Naruto jabbed a finger to the bandaged blade sitting on his back.

Omoi scratched his head, looking at his weapon. "Where's the Kubikiribocho? You didn't lose it right?! If you dropped it, it could potentially find its way into the hands of an owner who doesn't appreciate the sword and then the owner would-" Naruto cuffed the younger boy at the back of the head, getting him to stop his very, very, very, long train of thought before it could begin its inevitable crash.

"It's inside of Samehada," Omoi gave him a shocked look; "You wanna take a look?" The words 'inside of Samehada' made Omoi suddenly feel very uncomfortable, his cheeks obtaining a tint of green as he imagined the insides of the sentient blade.

"Urp." He grabbed at his lips, covering them with his palm. "I'd rather not. Thanks."

The five of them stopped directly in front of the fountain, before Naruto put his hands behind his head, staring at the bright streets around him. It certainly was a nice change of pace from the life in Konoha all those years ago. The glares were basically non-existent, replaced with curious gazes from the attire of Haku and Naruto and the weapon on his back.

"Well, if anything, I'm going to go around and take a look at the sights. Haku-chan?" The girl shook her head sadly, wanting to accompany her boyfriend/master, but was ultimately still sleepy. "Alright, you go back and rest." Naruto gave her a gentle kiss on her forehead, turning the girl around and patting her bum gently as she set off with Karui, the red head giving Naruto a glare for the public affection.

Samui's eye twitched. She didn't know why, but Naruto, despite meeting him only a few hours ago, made her feel different. Maybe it was the fact that he wasn't staring at her large breasts like all the other boys and men did, but he still enjoyed the androgynous girl's washboard body. Jealously was evident in her eyes. Samui wanted him to accept the fact that she had the best breasts like all the men in the village did and wanted to see Naruto worship her chest and body, him being the first to never do so.

Realistically, it was probably because she found Naruto to be attractive and a worthy male, and she wanted him. And she had just the idea on how to accomplish that…

Karui sneered at him, spitting angrily at him. "You make me sick. There are single people in the world too!"

Naruto chuckled and jabbed back at her relationship status, "Maybe you could get with Omoi!" The boy looked even greener, his cheeks puffing up, making him look as if he were a grape.

Karui grabbed a cabbage from a stall, flinging it at Naruto's head, making a direct contact as the cabbage exploded. "He's my cousin, you little shit!" The two girls disappeared, vanishing into the crowd of people.

"Well, I'd love to introduce you to the place, but I've got a D-Rank to do, painting houses calms me down." Omoi gave Naruto and Samui a two figure salute, rushing off to his low pay mission.

Naruto looked to Samui, "I guess it's just you and me," He grinned and Samui smiled softly. "Know anywhere we can go to relax and get to know each other?"

"Yes. Get to know each other… Very well." Samui smiled, grabbing Naruto's hand, sliding her fingers between his, "I know just the place. It's pretty cool." Naruto was slightly surprised by the gesture, but guessed that it was just Samui's thing.

Naruto looked interested, wanting to experience some of Kumo's highlights. "Cool. What can we do there?" For some reason, Naruto didn't like the look on her beautiful face.

"You'll see." She dragged him along, heading straight towards Kumo's hot springs. "You'll _love_ it."

* * *

Chapter End.

* * *

Er, wondering if you guys are interested in a harem with say, Samui, Karui, ?.

This is entirely up to you. I'm fine with just Haku and I'm fine with writing about more girls too.

Check my bio for the poll, and vote which ones you want. There's multiple catagories, but you can pick thrice.

And no, Samui isn't being a bitch, she's just uncomfortable with the fact that Naruto paid no attention to her breasts. Which to her is abnormal as fuck.

Anyways, review and the next one will showcase Prostitute Haku's Ice Clones

**Review and what not. Sorry if it disappointed you. You guys were waiting pretty long, huh?**

**Well, if you want to read other crossover fics with Naruto in them, check my profile out. We have RWBY, Avatar, OP, Pokemon, etc.**

**-Urethane**


	6. ABANDONED AND REWRITTEN!

_**This fic has been abandoned and is being rewritten. Beware all ye who enter here.**_

_Hello, this is Urethane! I'm just posting this chapter to tell you that the story has been rewritten. It is still going to be following the same plot, but I decided to just post it as a new story instead of replacing the chapter (since I added in slightly different things that may affect the other chapters). _

_This fic may or may not be deleted, but as of now it will stay. _

_If you would like to see the rewritten version, please check my profile. _

_Have a good night! _

_\- Urethane_


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